Tuesday, February 28, 2006

As mentioned in my sanctuary...

There are definitely people out with their brains sucked out by T-Virus..

[No offense] But this 'one' people who is out there lurking in the internet definitely badly infected with it. [Sorry, no offense, at least I'm polite here where else that 'one' people out there doesn't deserve to be called human!]

[What the big deal?] It's my forum and I can simply put 's' anywhere I want. I can put my 's' over here's' or over there's'. So's' what's' 'you' care's' about's'? Huh's'? Go shoot the wall if you don't like where I put my 's'. Anyway, it's my as's'. Why 'you' care so much, 'you-idiot-zombie'?

[With my magnum .5 fully loaded, I might shoot your head off you as's' zombie!]

Oh my desktop - Part 3

After 6 hours of operation, the surgeon finally walked out:

Surgeon : Congratulations! Your desktop's surgery is successful. We managed to wipe out the old infested memory and give you a newer system. Everything is fresh, new and fast.
Me : * Kam Tung * Thank you Thank you * Kam Tung *

The doctors pushed out the desktop to me. I just grabbed it and go home. I hugged it and kissed it.
Me : Good to see you again

Desktop : uh uh... what is your name? who are you?
Me : Don't worry both of us will have a good time together...

Doctors and surgeons : * eeee yeerr.. so gay wan... yuck! yuck! ptui! ptui! * This patient tak boleh tahan.... * quickly ran back to their offices and hide *

The end.

is sky the limit... oh my desktop, you are back!

Monday, February 27, 2006

Oh my desktop - Part 2

Today, my desktop situation remained unchanged and the doctor had finally came out with his diagnosis and suggested medical solution.

Doctor : You will need to brace yourself for the next brain memory formatting on your desktop.
Me : * sigh * but...

Doctor : If the symptom persists and the memory retains then it might become a plague and you will never see your desktop again. So far one of your friend's desktop has suffered such similar fate and still clinging in the desktop ward.
Me : Ok. What are the effect after you formatted my desktop?

Doctor : You will have a new companion and it will not remember anything that both of you have done in the past.
Me : I understand. Then, please proceed with the surgery to save it.

Doctor : Ok. The surgical procedure will be done in 8 hours. For the meantime, you can take some rest first. You look tired.
Me : Yes.

is sky the limit... curse those viruses out there! My desktop got corrupted!

Saturday, February 25, 2006

Client No.3

As he walked down the street of Anayasha ( Kingdom of the Harshal ), a young youthful lady walked past by and as soon as she got a glimpsed of him, she stopped and halted him.

"I know you!" she said.

"Hmm, but I don't recall we met anywhere"

"No, no, I apologized. We haven't met but I know who you are!"

"Hmm, sorry miss, I really have to go."

"No, wait, you are the consultant of Prominence!" she announced.

"Ok, I believed I can spare a few minutes for you, how can I help you?"

[The real story started this way.]

We sat on a bench of a serene garden...

"Okay you can start now.." I said.

"Well, I used to have a boyfriend in the uni I'm currently in but then we got separated." She said.


"Because there was a third party."

"Your boyfriend found someone more beautiful than you are? Just kidding.. who's the third party? A third girl?" I questioned.

"No, it was a boy!"

"Huh, you found out your boyfriend is a gay?" I was shocked.

"No lar, he's just fine, the third party was another guy falling for me." she answered.

"Go on..."

"I decided to stop my current relationship." she continued.

"Because you want the third party?"

"No, at first, I was confused and I didn't choose anyone." she explained. "But then not long, I decided whom I want, I decided to choose the third party."

"Then I don't see anything wrong here.." I'm confused now.

"Well, the third party refused to accept me even though he said that he still loves me.." she said.

"Then, you should start a new life.." I told her.

"It's not that simple as he's the one in my class. I got to see him everyday!" she exclaimed.

"You should tell him your feelings."

"I told him but he said he can't take me. He even asked me to find a new guy and don't cheat on your new lover! What the heck he wants?" she continued. "I even asked him what's wrong but he always stopped at that question and refuse to answer!"

"It's really hard for me as he still care and loves me!" she still speaking. "And he even helped me whenever I'm in need." "Whenever he flirt around, I couldn't bear it!"

"You should forget him and live on..." I comfort her. Her eyes swollen in red. [A bastard who doesn't know what he wants is a scumbag]

She explained to me that the guy always get closed to her and whenever she asked her why he couldn't accept her, he would be an ignorance, told her nothing will change (can't be a couple) and tell her to get a new bf. Why? because he loves her and care for her. This is just a BULLSHIT!

[The question of the story is why the heck that guy refuse to accept the girl when the girl loves him and the foolish guy also loves her. Yet, what the fucking foolish guy want? The guy want the girl to knee down and beg ah?] WTF, man! I just can't believe that such a guy would exist!

As I said mankind is such a weird creature.

Okay, perhaps, maybe the guy got his reasons but what? He got AIDS ah? H2N5? Cancer? Just all rubbish.. Maybe he can't ejaculate? or waiting for the money to come first?

[Shouting to that idiot] "DON'T YOU KNOW THAT GIRL IS CRYING FOR YOU?"

Well, the girl is currently waiting for the time to heal her feelings now. The burning heart. Trying to forget him but still got to see him everyday. It is hard for her.

Friday, February 24, 2006

ISTL - BlogsMalaysia.com

is sky the limit... no!

Oh my desktop - Part 1

My office's desktop is on medical leave. I cannot do the things that i normally do in the office. I have to use another desktop. Its like i am having an extra affair with another computer while my first computer is sick.

The same goes to my desktop when i am on leave. Nobody is there to touch it. I guess it is part of its scheme to teach me a lesson for not giving much care to it.

Me : Please, you must get well. I know I am wrong for abandoning you.
Desktop : Don't worry, i just got sick. I be fine by next week.

Me : What am i going to do then?
Desktop : You should go do some other useful things like cleaning your desk, arrange your files and have more conversation with your colleagues. You have been with me for so long i am sure you miss talking to your friends.

Me : But i need you very much.
Desktop : Don't worry i'll be here. Don't you dare go touch other desktops!

Me : I won't I promise you. I will be here next to you.
Desktop : Good. Now, i need to rest.

Me : OKay. Kiss!

Me : * wake up * my god! it can't be.. It can't be... its just a dream... its just a dream... * pinch pinch *

is sky the limit... my desktop is broken!

Is your pay negotiable?

Caller : Hi, I am calling from XXX company. We have seen your resume and would like to have a discussion with you. Are you free now?
A friend in the mamak : * Happy syok * Ok i am. Please go on.

Caller : I am XXX. Your resume fits our description for filling up XXX position.

Caller : When are you able to start work?
AFITM : In December.

Caller : Why?
AFITM : Coz i have such and such and need to fulfil it first.

Caller : I see. Maybe i can talk to your company and do something about it.
AFITM : Sure.

Caller : May i know what is your expected salary?
AFITM : My expected salary is RM3XXX.XX. What are the benefits that i am entitled to?

Caller : Uhm... is your pay negotiable?
AFITM : Sure. How low you want that figure to go down? RM2000? RM1800? RM1000? RM600? RM50?!

Me : * add salt and vinegar * WTF? You think my skill is from pasar ar?! You want me then you have to pay me. I am offended and disgusted by your question. Yes, you can always find another better candidate. Please do so. Click.

* Of cos la, this is just joking. I just make this part up *

Caller : Sorry, i did not meant to offend you. o_O"
AFITM : Look i tell you what. You talk to your manager first or you can ask your manager to talk to me. See you.

Caller : ok, See you.

is sky the limit... don't play play with my pay.

Which food chain is safe to eat?

Note: Long entry and don't complain.

With the world's primary food chain polluted and infected with diseases what food are left for human?

Food chain number 1, the cows are infected with the mad cow disease which we saw cows behaving madly, going crazy and flying over many moons. Restaurants serving beef will have to be careful so their customer won't get crazy and tried to fly over the moon too. Though its controlled now but fear is still there. " ...there goes another cow flying over the moon... "

Food chain number 2, the chicken are now having big time flu and have to stay in the bed for sometime. The chicken industry will have to find alternative solution to feed us. Right now, chicken is on MC (medical leave). Human visit chicken will get sick and die too. Somehow i always think that chicken might be the culprits. A revenge on the human for chopping our heads too much for their insatiable KFC or Ipoh Taugeh Ayam. If you visit the other type of chicken, you know what you will get also. Hehehe...

Food chain number 3, the fishes are contaminated with leads due to the industrial waste being dumped illegally into the rivers that flows into the ocean. Moreover, some fishes that is bigger than us is suffering from extinction too because of uncontrolled killings. Yes, i am talking about whales. Sharks is not left out too, the Chinese food industry is wiping them out for their good to eat and drink shark fins. This food chain also goes to crabs, prawns and sotongs. I mean squids.

Food chain number 4, the pigs is infected with JE (Japanese Encep -- something lar) and many cute little chu chai (piggys) had been destroy. I think Porky the pig will feel sad seeing his brothers and girlfriends infected and died-ed. Those who love Ma Ling's canned ham will feel depress because they will have Cintan Mee or Maggi Mee without it. I think this is good news for pigs and bad news for the Chinese who are celebrating. There is no festival without the presence of tasty roasted pigs!

Like i said in the third paragraph. I think these four groups are scheming something to go against human. We might not know and you may just felt good eating them. There might be an underground base filled with intelligent animals that could talk, think and do inventions. Maybe all these virulent diseases are part of their plan to counter attack human for consuming them too much over the centuries.

"I think human had enough of us. The quota has reach and its getting out of control. We have seen our sister chickens been fed with chemical to enlarge their breast to feed them. This is absolutely injustifiable!", cried the Chicken council.

"I witness my good old cow brother becoming slaughtered at the neck for their feast. He died and leaving his 5 caflings unattended. I pity for my cow! Mooo!", cried the Cow council.

"I witness how my brothers, sisters, wife, husband, children, relatives been toxicated and poison by their waste. Humans are inconsiderate and heartless. They never loved us. We should retaliate!", cried the Fish council.

"Oink! Those humans they never clean our living state. Oink. I felt nausea living in my own place. I say we fight! Oink!", cried the Pig council.

So readers, you might want to register yourself with the environment agency and start boycotting all the food chains. Maybe, you could be a vegetarian and go around sue people for their mistreatment of animals and damaging the environment.

Back to the main issue, with the three food chains contaminated what are we left? If we try eating kangaroos, koala bear, tiger, lion, zebra or giraffe then we risk facing the law. What about other animals that we often see in our animal picture book?

COM : i eat anything under sun.
Me : you are an Indian, shouldn't you be avoiding certain food?
COM : Aiya... what if there is no more food left? What if all die one day, just left with PORK? Sure you need to survive right?
Me : true true. But what if right now so many food has been contaminated, you not scared ar?
COM : Eat first, die later... hehehehehehe... i love pork! Oink! Oink!

I love my Cintan Mee with some slices of pork ham, one fried egg and a glass of fresh milk.

is sky the limit... eat first die later

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

The Mysterious Missing Sister - Part 2

Here is the conclusion for the first part:

The whole truth turned out to be more than you could imagine, her sister actually left the key in the room with her boyfriend. KK found out that her sister brought a new guy home afte she gone off to work. Though she was happy for her sister but she reminded her not to be so forgetful and make a new key for the boyfriend. Nah, just joking i made this up.

Actually, there was 10 people massacre in the room as reported by the news when KK found out. It was too late, KK's sister has escaped the country and left a bloody message on the wall that she will not return anymore. The killings has finally stop and the police decided to close the case. Nah, i just made this up.

Well, when KK return home, she found the key that her sister has left was lying underneath the coffee table. She was always reminded not to open her room. Out of curiosity she decided to open the door. It open to another world, icy just like the movie Narnia. But there were many beautiful sounds emitting from there. Then Padme popped out and say, "Peekaboo!". Alright, that is it, i made this up again.

Anyway, we found out that her sister just forget to take her room's key. Not the house key. So she was just locked out from her room only. Cheh... potong stim!<br>

TC, Padme, LF, COM and Me: ooh... cheh...

Me : KK, please do not cry... just joking only... hehehehehe...ok, go back to work!

is sky the limit... cheh...

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

COM got nothing to do

COM has been quite busy lately with his projects and when he walk over to see me, this is what he said:

COM: "Wooi, you blog, blog and blog... nothing to do iszit?"
me: yeah yeah... hehehehehe...

* Teng *

me: eh, you read my blog also mar... then you got nothing to do iszit?"

is sky the limit... oh yeah...

It's the world of plasticine.

As he strolled along the road, a lamp post fell and hit the person in front of him and smashed his head. ('Touch wood!')

He quickly turned and a tree fell which hit on the unfortunate pedestrian with the body sliced into two! ('Touch wood!')

"Oh my god, what the heck is this movie?"

"This is one piece of Happy Tree Friends version! Bastard, Final Destination 3, all the people in the movie died like Happy Tree Friends!"

"Unbelievable, I must take the director and the script writer to see the doctor!"

"Those guys must be affected by Happy Tree Friends or they been to Silent Hill or most probably, stayed too long in Raccoon City and got affected by T-Virus!"

He walked away from the cursed land and headed towards the sunset...

"I'm lucky to that I got this sanctuary from ISTL."

"Hopefully, no conspiracy around here."

The story are yet to begin...

P/S: Hmm, people are just so a weird creature... We are all so weird, don't you agree?

The Mysterious Missing Sister - Part 1

Something we always do every lunch that is get together with TC, KK, Padme, COM and LF. Today it was unusual. Not the food unusual but it was KK's sister.

While we were eating,

KK : Eh, do you know our supervisor whether she eats in or out of office?

Me and TC : dunno lar... why you ask?

KK : well, i got to get home after lunch because of my sister.

TC : Oh what happen to your sister?

* COM busy slurping his curry mee, LF and Padme looking at KK *

KK : She gone home and found that she has no keys, no purse and no mobilephone. Now she's locked outside.

Padme : * scratch scratch * You mean your house got buglar-ized?

KK : * giggle * no no... she forgot to bring her house keys, purse and mobilephone when she went to work.

LF, TC, and Padme : oh...

Me : * thinking thinking analyzing analyzing * she forgets everything but how did she close the house door and go to office?

KK : Yalar, i also don't know.

LF : yalar.

Padme : Hahahahahaha... yalar...

TC : * looking sharp at KK * you sure ar?

KK : * giggle and one hand waving * ya ya... that is why i need to go home after this.

LF : Maybe she went out to do laundry and then you went out to office. Locking her out?

Me : ya ya.. how about when you were sleeping she bring back boyfriend then something happen leh?

KK : o_O" No lar, she sleeps with me in the same room lar. Impossible lar!

Me : oooooh...hehehe... Like that you yum kung (pity) lor! You sleep so dead wan... see... your sister bring back boyfriend home to sleep next to you, also you don't know.. poor you...

* Everybody laugh and COM still slurping his curry noodle away muttering "ooohh... hot and spicy" *

KK : hahahahahaha... no lar...

Me : otherwise like this lor, she go to office, sit down on her chair and only realise "oh yeah, i think i forgotten something"

* Everybody laugh *

KK : hahahahahaha... no lar... o_O""

Me : Eh you sure your sister only forgets to bring house keys, purse and mobilephones ar? Did she not forget to wear clothes ar?

KK : hahahahahaha... no lar...

* everybody laugh *

LF : william! you ar! don't bully her lar...

Me : * continue drinking ice tea *

TC : ok lar KK you better go first...

KK : hihihihi.. bye bye...

I feel so bad! Am i? Anyway, this is a mysterious case. First, the sister forgets to bring her house keys. The question is how did she manage to lock the door before she left for office only to realize moments later that her house key is missing. Second, the sister forgets to bring her mobile phone. Well, this is ok because sometimes we all do forget to bring it out. Third, she forgets to bring her purse but this was fine since her office was within walking distance.

The real question was how did she lock the house door and only to find it missing?! Maybe she lost it during her walk to the office or maybe an invisible admirer had hypnotized her to surrender her house door. This is really a mystery.

The truth is out there...

is sky the limit... * scratch scratch * maybe

Random Chat - Marina and Cents

Marina : i going out wif fren
Marina : You want to buy me lunch huh?

me : i c
me : well, let count how many sens i have in my pocket first before i buy u lunch...hehehehe...

me :1 sen, 2 sens, 3 sens
Marina : * slap slap go die go die slap slap *

me : 4 sens, 5 sens, 6 sens
me : 7 sens, 8 sens 9 sens

me : hehehehehehe... * count count *
me :10 sens, 11 sens, 12 sens

me :13 sens, 14 sens, 15 sens
Marina : Argh!!! * slap slap go die go die slap slap *

me : hehehehehehe... ;)

is sky the limit... let's go count cents...

I am going to the hospital

Sometimes either things we do or things we say will either trigger certain reaction or create certain impression from other people. Regardless it is either positive or negative, the person who say it will always feel normal to it. For example, this morning i just sent my wife to work and on the way to office i come across two colleagues:

Smoking colleague 1 : Morning Wil, you are early today.
Me : Yeah, gotta send my wife to hospital.

Smoking colleague 1 and 2 : * shock * what happen to your wife?! Something wrong?
Me : Aiya i send her to work lar.

Smoking colleague 2 : Say lar you send her to work.
Me : Yalar... send my wife to hospital to work lar...

Smoking colleague 1 : hahahahahaha... going to hospital sound like something happen...
Me : Aiya, very normal mar, just like you say, "i'm going to company A" and people know you are going to work... who knows both of you reacted so syok-syok wor...

Smoking colleague 1 : hahahaha...
Me : ok lar... next time i say "i'm going to company A" and everybody should start saying, "CHOI! Touch wood! Touch Wood!"

Smoking colleague 2 and 1 : hahahahahahaha...

is sky the limit... i am going to the Chow Kit

Monday, February 20, 2006

Solving Office Problem - Part 1

Disclaimer: This is solely and only for entertainment purposes. Do not practice it. I will not be held liable for anything or errors that you have done or you had provoked your boss, supervisor, senior in the process after you had read this material. Any incident or person who had come across this scenario is just coincidental. If you intend to follow actions as describe below please do so at your own risk.

It happened to me once:

Me : Hi i have a problem XXXX and i need your advice on how to do it. May i know does the company have any protocols or procedures to do this?

Supervisor : I am not sure. Maybe you should talk to the manager.

Manager : I am not sure lar... itu [put a name here]'s job lar...ask [put a name here] lar

That person's name you put : Hmmm... not me lar... who told you this wan... go look for Mr XXXX and he should know.

Mr XXXX : What are you thinking and who told you wor? Go look for the boss lar... [mumbling][mumbling]... * eyes looking at the spreadsheet and both hands on his head scratching *

Boss : oh really, i am not aware of it. Please go see your supervisor and keep me updated via the email, will you?

Well, with this kind of situation above, you should perform the following procedure to cut the looping :

1. Stay calm because by the time when you see the second person or third person you are in the above situation so do not go further. Just stay where you are and return to your cubicle.

2. Concoct an email that read this:

Dear supervisor and all,

I have such and such problem at hand. How do i go about this? I have seen such and such faithfully and as recommended by you and they all do not know. Along the loop i was told to see the boss. At end, the boss asked me to go look for the supervisor. Moreover, he wish to know my progress.

Please advice.

Thank you.

3. Send this out and cc the boss since he asked you right?

4. Relax and wait for the response.

5. if your supervisor return you with an email asking you why did you send to such and such. Just reply : For their information only since they also do not know and boss also nak tahu.

6. If your supervisor or anyone provide you with the required information then just thank them.

7. if your supervisor turn out to be sour-pus and started lecturing you then just say, no one knows and you do not know and where is all this procedure could be found. Plus, telling yourself have tried all possible solution. Then say, "maybe you could help me out".

8. The end.

is sky the limit.... cut the loop man...

Malaysia Tourist Places You Must Visit : The Ever Loving Malaysian Mamak Stall

Note: This entry is length. Read at your own pace.

The CEO aka Devil talked about it and it reminded my time while still studying hard like an idiot back then in the university. I had the most meagre pay (my dad paid me and what can i expect) and every food that i could salvage was from this stall. This stall is famous in any places that you could find in Malaysia. Not only it represent our culture and our food we digest but it is the ever loving trend among the Malaysians whether its the socialites or just the brick laying men.

The mamak stall offers you many things if you just won't mind the environment:

1. Football season : This is a must have place to watch football with your mates. Order a glass of teh tariks each and you can watch your favourite team the whole night. What is teh tarik? Tea added with condensed milk and is pull to and from 2 cups (one cup to another cup) for the taste and the warmth feeling when drinking it.

2. Roti Canai : This is the star attraction if you are going to order food in a mamak stall. As Devil wrote, it is indeed a must have. Save the list for the Devil, you can get to see a whole description of rotis in his blog. My favourite rotis would be roti telur add with onions, kaya cream, mayonaise and served with chutney and dhal. Its feeling and nice. If you are not full then you can try their all time favourite nasi goreng mamak or nasi goreng ayams. COM recommended rawa thosai.

3. Girls : Well, look out for those nights. Sometimes ladies after their rounds of drinking and dancing, you will get to see some beautiful ladies spending their supper in mamak stalls. Occasionally, they stop by at mamak just to get sober before driving home. It can get pretty messy! God knows why they have to get so drunk every Friday night. I stopped doing that after one year of working. Of all the painful headaches and lethargic state in the morning, i rather stayed at home play computer games and cook dinner.

4. Discussions : other than footballs, rotis and ladies, you still get to see many groups having discussions from work to family topics. Any topics you name it. Therefore, there will be laughters, seriousness, and sometimes fights. However, at the end of it everybody still gets to finish their last drop of teh tariks. Teh tariks works like wonder. The moment you lay your bottom on those chairs, "Aneh, teh tarik satu!" (brother, one glass of teh tarik). To top it all, you can even have a drag of your cigarette and chat with your friends while waiting for your cuppa. You have to remember mamak stall is a special place because it is usually in an open air. Though you can still sit inside the stall most will prefer to have their moments outside just to smoke, drink and laugh together.

5. Date : If you can risk yourself from being nag the whole night by your partner for making her straight hair smelled like curry.

6. Extras : Sometimes, if you are lucky while having your time in the mamak stall maybe someone will come by and introduce you to some of the cheapest and newest movie.

In conclusion, mamak stall is just enriching and a culture that you can really spent your whole night there. If you feel you have no place to bond your mates just bring them to mamak stall. Do you feel not sleepy then why not head to your nearest mamak stall and drink? The beauty of mamak stall is that it brings the whole world to you instead of you bringing to them. By the way, its my time to get my cuppa.

is sky the limit... aneh, teh tarik satu! Kurang manis.

A good quote from Simon...

From the many seasons we had watched and recently, Simon is always fear by contestant who joined th American Idol but this is the best quote that i have ever heard from him this season:

Simon to the twins : I am fed-up with your he-she attitude...
Me in front of the tv : Whoa! Yeah Yeah...

is sky the limit... i am fed up with your he-she attitude... yup that's it

An Idea From Crude Hasting

[Advertisement - one guy was driving along a heavily traffic road]

While waiting and driving slowly, a man check his blog's entry via a PDA. Goodnes gracious, some of his entries were deleted. So he called one of his contributors and this happens:

Guy with PDA : Hey dude what's happen to my entry?
Guy drunk and blogging : Hic...Hic... oh yeah dude i was deleting some of my old entries...

GWPDA : Are you drunk?
GDAB : No i am bloggin... yeah, i drank too... why?

GWPDA : You DIMWIT! you just deleted some of my precious entry!

* Boom Crash Boom - GWPDA crash into someone's car - line went off - ti ti ti ti ti... * click *

GDAB : Hic Hic... ehehehehe... sorry dude... - crash - * click *

* then the whole bottle of beer pour onto the keyboard - zzzptt - and burned the whole pc - KABOOM! *

[Advertisement - Don't Drink and Blog. Its Dangerous!]

This advertisement is brought to you by isskythelimit.blogspot.com

Touch And Go

One day, one of Florence's colleague went to do her shopping. On her way, they need to pass a toll (Touch and Go). Here is what happen:

Colleague Driver : what's the long queue?
Colleague in passenger : maybe some jerk decided to switch lane and hit someone's else car kua?

CD : Hehehehehe... ok, its moving.
CIP : ok.

Suddenly, the car in front of them was taking quite a long time to pass the toll.

CD : Now, what's going on with him? Why is he not moving?
CIP : Waiting for change iszit?

CD : * Looking at her * U kidding me? This is Touch and Go lane lar...
CIP : oh...

After a minute or so, cars behind started honking and blarring them.

CD : Ok, that does it, i am going down to check it out.

She approach the car and found that Ah Pek was looking at the Touch and Go slot, he kept on touching it.

CD : Hey Ah Pek, what are you doing? Lei yau mou gau chor ar, kum loi gar, lar mei hou tor yan tang chi lei ar... (What's happening dude, you took such a long time and people behind is waiting)

Ah Pek says : I touch this slot and it won't let me pass... touch and go right? See, i show you... * touch touch caress caress mor mor *

CD : o_O"""" WTF!!!

is sky the limit... touch and go rox!

Saturday, February 18, 2006

I'm turning on the head light.

It's dark now and it's also early.

The portal has lengthen the night time and shorten the daylight.

It was a new experience to him.

He is much more busy than before...

It's so dark and he turned on the head light. All he could see on the banner was ISTL.

"What the f***k! I just bang my head on this banner!"

Perhaps, I drank Carlsberg last night that cause me so drowsy.

"Ah, who cares..."

He strolled on...

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Barber for the other part...

Me: tc
TC Boy: yo

Me: human have hairs on their head
TC Boy: yea

Me: what is the next best place that has as much hair as on your head?
TC Boy: huh?

TC Boy: human have hair everywhere
Me: i mean most hair like on human head

TC Boy: pls tell me where are u getting at?
Me: i am getting at some place where we only see it in toilet

Me: hehehehehe...
TC Boy: rigght...

TC Boy: go home n sleep man... o_O"""
Me: ever thought of opening a barber shop just for that part down under?

Me: hehehehe.,..

is sky the limit... let's get innovative

Twinkleler Twinkleler Littleler Starrrr....

I found this in Dr Liew's blog... click Twinkler Twinkler Littleler Starrr...

me : WHOA! Addictive... i am looking for this full song... hehehehe... Can anyone out there find this full version for me..?

Thanks in advance.

is sky the limit...oii twinkleler twinkleler littleler starrrrrrr....

Eat Eat Sleep Sleep

After eating dinner at 8:30pm, took a nice bath:

me : zzz.. zzz... zzz... zzz...

florence : ooi! its 9:30pm only! Open pat tou hung kan (channel 8) and watch lar... eat sleep only...

me : *_* ... pig mar...

florence : nag... nag... nag... nag...

me : * sei sei hei hei go to the tv and open channel 8 *...

-- then return to bed --

me : zzz... zzz... zzz... zzz...

florence : -__-" (hopeless and cannot be saved any more...)

is sky the limit... eat and sleep... yeah

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Pemandu Teksi

RUJUKAN : Tata-Tertib Teksi yang Memalukan

Kepada pemandu-pemandu teksi yang berkenaan,

Berdasar pada rujukan diatas, saya selaku pengguna jalan raya setiap hari selalu berdepan dengan pemandu teksi yang mungkin menghadapi masalah dengan cara pemanduan mereka. Antara kejadian-kejadian yang pernah saya alami:

1. Pemandu teksi yang mengambil penumpang di sebarang tempat sesuka hati bagai datuknya yang bina.
- Kalau dibuat demikian, kenapa bazir wang rakyat bina perhentian teksi supaya penumpang boleh guna dengan betul, tidak merbahayakan nyawa pengguna jalan raya lain, serta tidak menyesakkan lalu lintas negara yang semakin sesak setiap hari. Hari itu, tarikh 15th Februari 2006, sebuah teksi mengambil penumpang di satu jalan raya dan menyebabkan kesesakkan lalu lintas di depan Millenium Court. Bukankah depan sikit ada perhentian teksi. Adakah penumpang atau pemandu teksi buta ka? Syarat dan hukum pemanduan teksi masih tidak jelas. Kalau semua teksi berbuat demikian, runtuhkanlah semua perhentian teksi. Buat apa adakan perhentian teksi? Untuk keseronokan semua orang ka?

2. Pemandu teksi yang tidak menghiraukan lampu isyarat dan keselamatan pengguna jalan raya bagai datuknya yang beri.
- Buat apa kalau ada lampu isyarat di jalan raya dan pemandu teksi tidak mematuhinya. Ini juga membazirkan wang rakyat. Pemandu teksi bukan saja tidak mematuhi undang-undang jalan raya tetapi juga mengugat keselamatan pengguna jalan raya lain. Hari itu, tarik 14th Februari 2006, sebuah teksi berhenti di tengah-tengah jalan berkembar. Saya tidak dapat mentafsirkan kelakuan teksi tersebut. Sama ada dia nak ke kanan atau ke kiri ka saya tidak tahu. Tetapi perbuatan yang lama itu telah menyebabkan banyak kereta dibelakang saya bunyikan hon. Jadi saya terpaksa menyuarakan hon kereta saya. Lalu dia gerak ke kanan. Jadi saya meneruskan perjalanan. Bukan setakat itu saja. Selepas 0.3 km, saya berhenti di satu lampu isyarat dengan satu kereta disebelah. kemudian datang teksi itu, dia menyalakan lampu isyarat ingin belok ke kanan dan hon kereta sebelah saya. Pemandu itu selaku orang yang baik mengikuti lampu isyarat jalan raya hanya buat tidak tahu saja kerana lampu isyarat masih merah. Jadi, teksi itu menyalakan lampu isyarat ingin belok ke kiri dan hon saya. Saya juga lantak dia. "Apa lu mau, gua buta ka? Tak nampak ka depan sedang merah?" saya cakap dalam hati. Tapi, pemandu teksi itu masih ingin lalu, dia buat satu pusing dan potong kita dan langgar lampu isyarat merah itu. Sewaktu dia berbuat demikian, dia memaki saya. Jadi, saya terus menunjukkan isyarat antarabangsa bagi dia. Inilah sikap-sikap pemandu teksi.

Diharap pemandu-pemandu teksi yang bertauliah hormatilah undang undang jalan raya dan jagalah tata-tertib anda.

Sekian Terima Kasih.

Nota: Kalau anda seorang pemandu teksi yang bertauliah nasihatilah pemandu-pemandu lain agar masyarakat dapat memenuhi wawasan kita sebagai rakyat Malaysia.

adakah keupayaan manusia terhad... tidak

Divine effect

As he scourge the ISTL, he stumbled across a file named.. no, not XXX but smallville...

He picked it up and looked closer "Season 5 episode 1".

His device suddenly popped up and sucked the file into the device and all his mind twisted and twirled...


Lex Luthor became more evil than before.

Clark found his secret chamber (in the original superman : the crystal cave that appeared after Clark threw a green crystal). But in smallville, the crystal was actually the combination of three different stones to make a shape of Superman's Logo. The animation was 'darn' cool.

Lana Lang eventually did told Clark that she love him and so did idiotic Clark.

More meteor shower, "Anyone hot shower?", it fell from the sky again this time and hit Clark's parents home. Direct hit but... (watch for yourself).

If I were to say anymore here, someone from ISTL will surely brings out a 'parang' sword and hack me... then I have to go vagrant again.


Tuesday, February 14, 2006

enlarging and firming everywhere?

Really anywhere?? I got this pic from Amcorp Mall...

is sky the limit... anywhere...

Monday, February 13, 2006

Top Ten...

Yesterday Chap Goh Mei marks the end of 2006 Chinese New Year. That night we were watching Hong Kong's Top 10 Song Award. I am not sure which year.

* TV : ".. we have our next nominee Wai Lan, Soler, Twins, SHE, Yanzi... "
Me : My goodness.. what kind of name is that Wai Lan... why she pick that name... sound like "make my life miserable"... wai lan.. wai lan.. you want to "wai lan" me meh? Also who is that group SOLER? Ayo... my goodness... SOLER... what does it stand for? SOLER... SOLER... my goodness... why not SOLAR, POLAR, MOLAR, MO MO LAR, SO SO LAR...

Florence : aiya.. you won't understand one lar.. these are new groups... hahahaha...
Me : I know i am old lar. But i still recognise TWINS, SHE, YANZI, AH MEI but must this group named SOLER and WAI LAN... my goodness... as though there are no more names... Wai Lan and SOLER names so WAK TAK (ugly)!

Florence : Hahahaha... yalar... yalar... you better go update...
Me : I still like Beyond, Alan Tam, Sally Yeh, Hacken Lee, Andy Lau... look at Lau Tak Wah, he is still look good all this years. In fact, of all the Four Heavenly God, I still like Jacky Cheung and Andy Lau. The rest GHKWH (God Heaven's Know What Happen!). NOt to mention George Lam (Ah Lam), Anita Mui, Leslie Cheung...

Florence : Ok ok ok... stop stop... tak boleh tahan... o_O"
Me : Ya mar... their voice is better than today's group or individual.

Florence : Old man! :P
Me : Ok ok lar... give me some face lar... i still knew TWINS, SHE, YANZI, Eason (i hated him... Don't ask me why), Edison (good for looks only), Leo Ku (the one who sang cats and dogs.. why not pig)...then your handsome and hamsup idol Jay Chou, ...

Florence : ok ok ok... stop stop... tak boleh tahan... o_O" Bising...
Me : hehehehe...

is sky the limit... whoa man i still love Beyond!

Vagrant, you have been promoted!

"Ahem, hey you, vagrant, what's your name?"

"Me? I.. I.. do not know for I.."

"Okay, now I will register you a new nickname called ... Jeff. Now begone.."

[He was zoom out of the sky and fall on the ground]

He woke up, feeling a bit dizzy. All he remembered now was his new name is Jeff. He looked at the sky again. Was the sky the limit?

He stood up and his brain suddenly bulged with all the memories during a festival known as... ... ... ... ... Chinese New Year.

[His brother.. his brother's girlfriend... the 'mahjong'..... the playstation.... the red packet... a cave... and some of his good friends...]

"Ah, pain in the ass.. what the f***k.."

"I still got load of tests and assignments to be done!"

The starting of a new portal...

[Suddenly, a huge giant gateway falled from the sky and landed just rigth in from of him..]


He was stunned and fall onto the ground while looking high up at the humongous plate like glowing portal. He stood up, adjusting himself and looked carefully at it closer.

[On the gateway it had a encrypted code message that sounds like this: "Welcome, to those vagrant who seek more knowledge, thou shou not wonder for thou has been promoted to a permanent portal that require no journey to the other far land to seek the knowledge thou seeking"]

He scratch his cheek and look onto the sky. He faltered for awhile and put his hand into the portal. As soon as he touched the portal, it glowed in bright colour.

[Loud voice were heard from beyond the gate]

"Hey, idiot, do you want to come in or not?"

The vagrant looked at his surrounding area and before he could do anything, a pair of hand appear from the gate and dragged him in.

"Welcome vagrant to the world of Streamyx.. Do not question, just use it wisely!"

He appeared in another dimension...

His surrounding seems to be cloudy...

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Pay to work or work to pay...

One of my principles when it comes to working is that i very much "pantang" or taboo that i have to pay to work. Recently, a friend of mine were talking to me about how an MLM talked to him about getting rich without having to work so much. The deal? You have to pay a certain amount of hundreds of dollars to be a member. After paying, you will have recruit members and sell things. Whether the returns will be great, the results is unknown.

First, if i am going to work i will make sure that i won't pay anything. Instead, i offer you my service and you pay me. That is why i hate MLM so much. Have you ever consider that when you either buy their products or becoming a member the chances of striking rick works?

Second, i don't like begging or persuading people to join something or buy something. Hell, if your product are damn good i don't think you need people to walk around and ask people to buy. Instead people will come to you and buy it themselves.

Third, you may argue that MLM method is just one way of introducing to the people. So? Plus what happens if the company close down or they don't want MLM anymore while you still earn nothing? Its not stable. Period.

Fourth, you may even argue that you can take your own time and recruit members (what the hell happen to HR department?) or sell products. WTF? If i don't go find members or sell your products my points will remain low and wouldn't get much. No way, i am going to waste my money on MLM thingies and sweat off my time go look for some Ah Bengs and Uncles to get their money.

Fifth, don't come and talk to me about MLM. You want me to pay you for membership? Why not i pay you and you go look for members for me and i earn your points. Go fly kite!

In conclusion, i worked 8 hours a day and is enough. Seeing customer another extra hours and for sure have to see customer faces and farts for MLM is not my cup of tea. I rather use my extra hours to do something beneficial like still getting money and not paying anything large amount of money for membership fees.

Tell me why do i need to pay RM300 to work (recruiting members is still a work) and be a member and still have to go find members for you? Absolutely it is out of the question.

is sky the limit... i get paid for working not paying to work. Go fly Kite!

Random Chat - Ipoh Girls

Every where i go and every person i met in Malaysia for sure i will be asked with that question every time.

Any man : william, which hometown are you from?
Me : Oh, i am from Ipoh.

The northen second city of Malaysia situated in the state called Perak.

Any man : Oh! you are from Ipoh... Wah! Ipoh girls are beautiful...

Me : Really?

Getting asked with that question sometimes is really annoying. I do not have an grudge against my own female counterparts coming from my home town. Just that, i don't really believe so much on it. There are still other beautiful girls in other states and cities.
My beautiful wife is not from Ipoh.

One man : Oh yeah...
Me : Named one...
One man : Aiya... its true mah...
Me : Kuala Lumpur doesn't have any beautiful chicks is it?
one man : Ayoo... my man... KL girls full of make-up lar... not as authentic as Ipoh girls mar...
Me : So you mean they put too much make-up... aiya, Ipoh girls also put make-up to look beautiful lar... there are KL girls who did not put make-up also look as beautiful as Ipoh girls... totally disagree with you...
One man : no lar.. you won't understand one lar... you know the meaning of sweet... they look sweet lar... hai...
Me : Nah, here is a Cadbury's chocolate... very sweet too.
One man : dun wan to argue with you...
Me : ok ok lar, ipoh girls beautiful lor...

is sky the limit... * nothing to say *

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Cave-ing Movies...

The Cave (2005)The Descent (2006)

A group of sea cave divers were hired to explore a cave underneath a church. The group sees it as a chance to discover and the cave too.

A group of hardy and challenge loving ladies trying to improve back their relationship by exploring an uncharted cave.

Group consist of 80% male 20% female

Group consists of ladies only.
Group attacked by creatures.Group attacked by creatures.
Creatures with wings looked like ogres.Creatures looked like ogres.

Creatures were once human but transformed after infected.

Creatures were there since the prehistoric time.
Creatures can see in the dark.Creature is sensitive to sound in the dark.
Men fought creatures.

Ladies fought creatures and there is one girl-female creature fight scene. This scene seems like showing woman power.

Cave climbing scenes.Cave climbing scenes.
All died except a few able to escape.All died.
Happy ending story.Sad ending story.
Rating : BRating : C+

From my point of view, i just could not stop comparing it to the first cave movie, the Cave. Both of these movie is too similar and too predictable. So what's next from Hollywood? Let's remake the Cave with Peter Jackson.

is sky the limit... yes.

Men and Women... both needs each other...

She said : Women are crazy. Men are stupid. Women are crazy because men are stupid.

I said : Men are stupid because women ask crazy stuffs.

is sky the limit... go crazy go stupid yeah!

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Happy Thaipusam 2006

Hi all,
Again, with the next coming festivity after Chinese New Year, Thaipusam sets in. I would like wish all my Indian friends a very Happy Thaipusam. Drive safely and rest enough before continuing on with your journey back home.

Happy Thaipusam (Thaipusam Vaalthukkal - as greeted in Indian)
The ISTL Management.

Random Chat - Put there also got ppl c?

Once upon a day after many, many moons ago, now it came back...

liling says : hihi
William says : hihi.. what wind brings you to my little corner
liling says : haha.. nolah..
liling says : c ur name i n my list ma..
liling says : how ur new year?
William says : oh
William says : my new year.. ok ok
liling says : haha..
liling says : got eat too much a?
William says : yeah
William says : alot
liling says : then
liling says : get fat a?
William says : oh yes.. added 5 kg
liling says : got or ?
liling says : 5 kg very geng ler..
William says : geng?! scary lar
William says : visit: www.isskythelimit.blogspot.com
liling says : wat tat?

William says : A blog, is a weapon, that you can aim and shoot nuclear missiles at those girls like you...!

* Just kidding i make this up but this is not the cun part *

William says : it's my personal blog where i can put stuffs into it and let people read...
liling says : oooo...
William says : had it quite sometime oredy
liling says : oo really?
William says : yeah i never really expose it so much lar only a few people.. this year they ask me to get it more expose
liling says : they?
liling says : who?
William says : but still i am quite selective lar
William says : they my frens lar
liling says : ooo...

* here comes the cun part *

William says : u won't mind if i put our conversation into my blog right?
liling says : conversation?
William says : yeah
liling says : we talk nothing wor..

liling says : put there also got ppl c? * ISTL's spectacle fall down *
William says : yeah
liling says : ooo..
liling says : ...

William : Nothing to say anymore...

is sky the limit... got people c meh?

Washing your eyes

Caution : 18 SX material. Read at your own risk.

Two men drinking at a cafe in a shopping mall:

man 1: wow... look at that girl... cantik oh...
man 2: nice legs... very fair also...
man 1: yalar... nice hair... face also cute... see how she walks... the punggung (arse) so tight...
man 2: hehehe... good to grab... eh your wife in the past also like that lar... hahahaha...
man 1: hai... that was the past lar...
man 2: Dun lar... still your wife mar... see... see... another one coming... wah very big oh...
man 1: no lar.. this butt is not big lar... just perky lar...
man 2: who say butt? I'm saying her breast lar... idiot!
man 1: ya hor... must be nice to squeeze...
man 2: here here... another one... wah this one damn sexy... bareback and lacy skirt...
man 1: umm... umm...
man 2: Hai... my wife calling... * answers his mobile phone * ... eh.. i gotta go... catch you later... bye
man 1: see you... i call you out next time...

Two men washing eyes in a mall...

is sky the limit... go wash eyes!

My Blog's worth...

My blog worth only of USD 2,258.16. So if i sell my blog, i will be getting around RM5K. The pricing still is good. Maybe i should start full time blogging and put more stuffs into it. So if michael's blog worth millions of dollar so he will be a millionaire and no need to work anymore... even devil's blog worth more than mine... Sigh.. i guess i have to work harder....

money.. money... money... its so funny... in a rich man's world...

hahahahaha... just kidding... not bad for a site that could evaluate blogs...

is sky the limit... money, money, money, its so funny, in a rich man's world...

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Mahjong Mahjong...

Of mahjong and chinese new year, you will see a lot of cauliflower aunties playing mahjong. Pot bellied and balding uncles in one corner playing their favourite poker and smoked all night long. Most probably all the Ah Sei's (maid) job will be very pack too.

Mahjong, each of those tiles that is as big as your thumb is shuffled and played by four players. The sound of the clashing tiles filled every night during the Chinese New Year is enough to make you sleep less and stayed up late for more Chinese New Year night movies. My opposite neighbour was not loosing out too. They have the biggest team (3 mahjong tables) and ours just one!. It is enough and deafening added the shoutings of winning and losing effects.

I always wonder why the Chinese would come out with such an addictive game. Why couldn't the Chinese come out with PS 2 or other game consoles in the early days? Imagine if the Chinese came out with Nintendo, Sega or PS 2 in the first place instead of SONY.

You will see pot bellied and balding uncles and cauliflower aunties crouching by the TV and holding those consoles. PS 2 is green and will have four keypad consoles. Navigation symbol will be named after North, South, East and West. Those X, O, Square and Triangle buttons will be some other mahjong symbols. Urgh! Speaking of cauliflower aunties, i observed some of them are spotting the long straight iron-ed hair nowadays. What will
michael called these aunties?

Anyway, Florence won her first mahjong game:

is sky the limit... go play mahjong!

Eat, Eat, Eat - Gong Xi Fa Chai!

Ipoh - On the 1st day till 4th day of Chinese New Year, i only eat, eat, eat and as a result... i have become so prosperous that moving my arse just to grab the tv remote control was so difficult. Mom, Grandma, First Auntie, Dad, Third Bro, and Florence said, "You are FAT!" Argh!!!!... I really need to go to Marie France!

Preparation for Chinese New Year

Prawns, Sea Cucumber, Pig Legs, Huge Steam Pomfrets, Steam Kampung Chicken, Chillie Crabs, Tofu, Biscuits, and lots' more..

And Supper nearly every night before sleeping

Even in shopping with Florence, can't waste on those delicious Doraemon's Dorayaki!

End Result : Weighing in 70 kg... Prosperous in Dog Year!

is sky the limit... eat, eat, eat, come on let's eat!