Friday, March 31, 2006
At 5.45pm, a short message came into his phone. He checked the message:
"RM20.00 was successfully reloaded into your account."
He looked left and right, scratched his head and confused. He was walking down the lane and suddenly, RM20.00 was reloaded into his phone out of no where. Funny, so he took out his laptop and checked who did such a kind deed but in vain.
Happy, happy, he skidded and hopped along the path.
At 7.20pm, someone phoned with weird number. He took out his phone and answered it.
CH : "Hello!"
Kind Soul : "Hello, who's this?"
[He was stunned, what the heck with phone communication nowadays? People phoned you and asked who are you? Where is the logic?]
[I was 50% annoyed but still calm.]
CH : "Hmm, who are you looking for?"
Kind Soul : "Hmm, actually just now I accidentally reload my credit to your phone so can you
transfer credit to my phone?" "Sorry - ah, sorry -ah!"
CH : [at a state of confusion] "Hmm, how do I transfer RM20 to your phone?"
Kind Soul : "Oh, simple only, just like normal transfer or reload, just type in my phone!"
CH : "I don't know how to do it!"
Kind Soul : "Maybe you go to a phone shop and ask them to do it. Just RM20 only. Sorry -ah,
CH : [?????] "Okay, I try my best-lar." [evil grinned]
Kind Soul : "Thank you and very sorry!"
CH : Okay, I'll try my best.
[Both hung up]
The moral of the story - Welcome to the world [the caller a woman, it seems]! If you wrongly reload your credit to someone, I bet absolutely no one would willingly return it to you unless he/she your bestfriend whom is just next to you. Furthermore, you do not the location of me and how you so sure that I will return the credit to you? And most of all, you just lost RM20 and you still got the urge to waste more money on calling me with a Maxis number!
"I'm terriby sorry if my words are too rough, vulgar, impolite or rude but this is life! Money money, money!"
"Do you think I would go to the nearest phone shop and ask them to transfer RM20 which will in turn burn my wallet for another RM20 simply for you?"
[I believed you're too naive!]
At the end, he continued eating his lunch "Kung Pao Yu Pin", then he paid for it and returned home for shower.
"Hmm, did someone phone me just now?"
WARNING : CEO be prepared to be gotcha! Happy April Fool Day Devon! This is for you!
Selamat pagi/petang/malam sekalian,
Sekarang tibalah masa kita mengundang CEO ke wawancara "Jalan Jalan Mencari Jodoh". Segment hari ini, CEO akan menceritakan macam mana kita boleh "tackle" perempuan tak kira di tepi jalan raya atau di pub.
Marilah kita bermula:
ISTL : Selamat datang ke segment kita, CEO.
CEO : Sama-sama, dah lama kita tidak berucap ya?
ISTL : Ya. CEO, hari ini kita akan berbincang macam-mana kita boleh ber"tackle" perempuan dalam semua keadaan.
CEO : Cun... no problem... it's my field...
ISTL : Baru-baru ini munculnya banyak chicks di tempat kerja anda, jadi macam-mana anda menangani semua keadaan itu?
CEO : Pertama, saya syoknya dan rasa g-e-m-b-i-r-a skali! Second, kita mesti selalu ber-steadi... steady lar bro...
ISTL : Faham. Harap pembaca sekalian dapat mencontohi CEO... steady is the word
ISTL : Dalam entry anda, anda nyata ada seorang chick datang dekat dan membelai tangan anda. Kenapa anda elak dia?
CEO : Ini isu pride saya lar... tak boleh senang dapat belai...
ISTL : Oh begitu... jadi macam-mana seorang perempuan harus mendekati anda?
CEO : Perempuan itu, bukan setakat belai tangan saya saja. Itu tidak akan beri banyak rangsangan kepada saya. Dia sepatut cium telinga saya sewaktu belai tangan saya. Tambah lagi, saya tidak dapat hidu minyak wangi kesukaan saya. Oleh itu, mungkin dia patut guna minyak wangi Calvin Klein yang terbaru atau DKNY yang terkini.
" ... tidak akan beri banyak rangsangan kepada saya... "
ISTL : Rupanya begitu... kalau perempuan itu, yang anda nyata dalam blog anda, datang lagi dan melakukan apa yang tadi CEO kata... adakah anda akan menerima dia?
CEO : * wink * wink * senyum sipu sipu *
ISTL : Janganlah segan CEO... kita sini semua lelaki... bagitau lah kitorang...
CEO : Pastilah saya akan menerima dia.. dah lama saya sendiri kat atas gegunung ini... harap semua faham keadaan saya di-atas... sunyi... balik rumah sendiri pun tengok balak saja... dvd dan vcd pun dah lama luput... hari ini beli esok dah luput...
ISTL : Ok lah... kita semua faham... saya harap CEO akan dapat cari jodohnya dengan cepat... dan dapat menbasmi kuman sunyi di atas gunung itu...
ISTL : sekian sahaja sampai sini... diharap perempuan dalam blog CEO ada baca ini dan silalah beri lagi satu peluang bagi CEO... kitorang di ISTL juga akan berasa gembira kalau CEO tidak lagi kesunyian di atas gunung itu.
ISTL : Sekian sahaja.. kita jumpa lagi di segmen lain kali... jangan lupa... "Jalan Jalan Mencari Jodoh"...
is sky the limit... "jalan jalan mencari jodoh"...
Florence : Ah Sei, where is your one dollar?
Me : Oh, here you are... * focus on driving *
Florence : Eh, why RM0.40 only?
Me : What?!
Florence : hehehehehe... gotcha!
Me : You ar... nanti i langgar the rails or langgar the car in front or langgar the toll gate macam mana? You pay ar? Play play...
Florence : * cry *
** No lar, i did not scold her. I wouldn't have the heart to scold her. I lover her. Back to the story.
Me : You scared me... * nearly sweat *
Florence : Hehehehehe... eh ah sei, what if we tell the toll booth that we don't have RM1.00?
Me : I dunno... i guess i just park one side and call COM for help...
Florence : No lar, we tell the girl we top up her phone RM3.00 and she can give us RM2.00. Cannot ar?
Me : Wah, like that you also can think. How you come out with such an idea?
Florence : Hehehehe... possible mar... I top up her phone by RM3.00. She just give us back RM2.00 lar.
Me : What if hers is different telco?
* kling kling * she drop my two RM0.50
Me : What did you drop?! What did you drop?!
Florence : Oops! Your two RM0.50...
Me : We are near the toll oredy... wah lau... so dark how to find it ar?
Me : quick quick ... RM1.00 from wallet... we are reaching toll oredy...
* One hand on steering and one hand at the back of my buttock to grab my wallet *
Florence : * fumble her bag for RM1.00 *
Me : No need lar... I have RM1.00
Florence : Hahahahahahahaah...
Me : laugh somemore... go find the two RM0.50 ar...
Florence : Ok ok... here i found one only... the other one, you look for it once you reach your office... hehehehehe...
Me : ayo ayo ayo...
Florence : Hahahahaha... morning sudah gila...
is sky the limit... the two RM0.50
Thursday, March 30, 2006
Lord Jeff was looking for COM:
Lord Jeff: COM on leave?
Me: oh yes
Lord Jeff: birthday boy on leave la
Me: yeah... celebrating with some girls... i guess...
Lord Jeff: now he forget frens like us
Me: aa... give the man a chance to do some horizontal refreshment lar... he needs it too... moreover, he's desperate lar
Lord Jeff: haha
is sky the limit... COM where are you?
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Today ISTL is going to have an exclusive interview with our famous COM. In conjuntion with his coming birthday in 2 days time. We are going to talk to him and allocate an entry in ISTL dedicated to him.
ISTL : As you see COM is a very busy man. COM is one of the more establish macha in Kepong. In line with our first great interview with CEO. COM is the man of all machas. He deserve it. With the coming age, how are you feeling?
ISTL : That is great. Please tell us what is your birthday wish?
COM : First of all, i would like to sleep with William. Second be elected into the parliament and third to keep everything real.
ISTL : o_O""" Why William? Aren't they any girls that catches your eyes?
COM : Girls... wasting my time. William better.
ISTL : Ok... Ok... so what are you going to do if you are elected?
COM : Hmmm... for the first thing and to keep it real, i will, increase tax in all women lingerie (bras and panties). Second, reduce the petrol price. Third, i will enforce horizontal refreshment for all men. That will make the boys happy for their entire life. oh yeah, i can't wait for that to happen. Moreover, our boys have been working too hard and its about time for them to refill and refuel their spirit. Horizontal refreshment will give them the boost.
ISTL : Woooo... cool! * ISTL's image gone... *
COM : * In Ali G * Keep It Real!
ISTL : Here is our great COM himself. Happy Birthday Mate.
Happy Birthday to You!
Happy Birthday to You!
Happy Birthday to You!
Happy Birhtday to "Chief of Macha"!
Happy Birthday to You!
is sky the limit.... COM's Big Big Day on 30th March.
Tuesday, March 28, 2006
At one point,
Me : our parents married young. My mom married at 21.
TC : Yeah, it was early.
Padme : If you get married you will have children and your pay won't be able to sustain your family.
Padme : And I think China is having one child policy right?
Me : Yeah.
TC : Yeah, but getting married you have to think a lot about expenses. Its not cheap.
Me : Yeah. Milk, diapers, cereals, baby shirts, baby socks, cradles, toys, prams, baby chairs. Then when they grow, you got to worry about kindergarten's fees, then primary school fees, eat and drink, vacation, toys, books, uniforms, then college where you will have to pay them for mobile phones, movies, dates, books again, nicer and trendy clothing, watches, saloon, etc... etc...
Padme : *_*" understood... understood
LF and Kerry : * giggling *
TC : not to mention, you have to give ang pau (red packets) during Chinese New Year. Also you won't be getting one either.
Me : * groan * oh yeah... now you remind me that...
Padme : * laugh *
LF and Kerry : * laugh *
TC : Hmmm... that is why i still favour my now good and relaxing single life.
Padme, LF and Kerry : * Laugh *
Me : Eh, don't see marriage as dead end lar... Once you are married, its will become more colorful, exciting and vibrant....
Padme : * laugh *
Me : Maybe you can also use this as a reason to tell your future employers that you got mouths to feed and need increment, cola, kids allowance, benefit and blah blah blah...
Padme : Yeah right...
Me : The more the better... how about 9 to 13... and start a football match?
Padme : Oi...
Alright, the last part i made that up. Marriage is a holy matrimony event that is celebrated between the couple and announce to the WWW. Cool isn't it. Its whole wide world.
I don't care when i get married i will have my marriage on the WWW.
is sky the limit... WWW
Monday, March 27, 2006
ISTL is proud to present to you all a new blogger. Let me introduce you to Chicky. Crunchy, spicy and cute. You will love it. Definitely not from uncle Sanders. Originate from Labuan and its has never before set path in here so it will be the first time for her.
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Me : * think *
* after 5 minutes *
Me : * think *
* after 5 minutes *
Me : shit, its like trying to shit but shit won't come out. Forget it.
Is sky the limit... shit won't come out
Friday, March 10, 2006
"Ah, what the heck?"
"What kind of nanny is this?"
I had been disappeared for long due to the chronosphere which incorrectly transfered me to the the 8o's of the world where I met Brown's family who urgently need a nanny to take care of six(6) children.
Well, I was flabbergasted when the nanny gave a human characteristic to the donkey which in turn can dance, sing and flirt!
So much for the nanny.
[Blink!] - Back to the current world.
"What the heck! I got an 'exam' on Sunday!?!"
"Shit shit you 'exam'!"
"I haven't read 'you' yet!"
"OMG, what the heck am I going to do?"
[And I'm here blogging!] - What a paradox! But isn't that human characteristic?
People confuse each other in a lot of ways...
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Me: COM do you know where is shitibank
COM: Next to KLCC
Me: Ok thank you.
If you ever wonder will i be inserting some hardware or gadget updates then perhaps i will when i ever find something cool or superb. Then, i only put into that technical blog. As you see, i am more of a coding and concept guy so i am not very much into hardware. Don't ask me what is the latest hardware selling in Low Yat or Imbi. Coz if you do, i will refer you either to this site or you can talk to COM and TC Boy.
Happy Launching ISTL: The Technical
Is sky the limit... The Technical
Monday, March 06, 2006
My first cave : Sam Poh Tung
There are turtles for you to feed. Take a look at Raphael’s cousin. Its cute, right?
This Michaelangelo eating.
Now, here is the Donatello. Cowabunga dude! Master Splinter won’t mind if I grab a few more bites.
Inside the cave, this are the high walls encircling the turtle pond the temple.
The second cave : Kek Lok Si
The entrance looked like an archaelogical site. Its windy once you enter the cave. Its windy than the first cave.
Crude Hasting and behind him are the three Buddha’s. Peace on Earth. Amitabha. Crude Hasting : * Pray * I wish to have more than one girlfriend. * Amitabha *
Some of the rocks formation found in the cave.
Another rock formation on the ground. Most of this rock formation are barricaded from visitors.
Here is another rock formation.
Here is another rock formation on the ground opposite above formation.
This rock formation suppose to have water on its tip. I guess I need a better camera or I need better lighting.
is sky the limit... wonderful caves in Ipoh
For you guys out there who love stalagmite and stalatit, you can visit both of this caves. It has all those rocks that you can find for your photo album. Admittance to both caves are free of charge. However, in the first cave, Sam Poh Tung, you might want to buy a few spinach or kang kung from the stalls nearby to feed the turtles. Trust me there are more than just four teenage mutant ninja turtles in that cave. Take your sweet time and feed them. They will love you.
I remember when I first took my second Economy class (who told you that my first double degree was Bach. IT? No, I was a Finance/Accounting student before I changed to Information System) in Sydney, the number one rule from the syllabus I always remember is:
When there is a demand for goods and services there will be a supplier to supply it. Said that, both will always be in equilibrium. Else, there will be oversupply or under demand and vice versa.
With continuous expansion and huge shopping complexes in KL like the MidValley Megamall, 1 Utama, The Curve, Ikano, Jusco, Tesco, Ikea and another coming up gigantic GSC building it kept me thinking whether people here are that rich. I have not included the golden triangle area (StarHill, Sungei Wang, and what’s that another place I kept on forgetting) Do we really spent a lot? Or, the Malaysian economy has finally caught up and running after 1997 economic crisis. It has been a long time and I think many people had forgotten that incident.
I did felt the pinch from that crisis when I was in Sydney especially with the exchange rates. Nevertheless, I still managed to finish my two years of study in Sydney. Although I did not manage to finish another three years there (who told you I did my twinning in KL? I never did any twinning programme, I went to Sydney to study for my degree) but it was fun staying there. Nice weather, nice shower (rain) and nice girls. Well, you may want to visit King’s Cross in Sydney during the summer.
Anyway, here is my last entry before I go to bed.
Is sky the limit… economy, Sydney, study, girls, and sleep?
Florence : Look, this car has a flat tyre on its left rear side.
Me : Yeah.
* After a few minutes of silence *
Me : I was thinking should I go down and inform the Ah Pek. If I don’t do it I feel bad about it. If I do it then I risk being called a busy body or mind your business buddy. Well, I think I better just stay in here and wait for the light to go green.
Florence : * looked at me *
Me : Alright, I just stay put.
Florence : Yalar… maybe the Ah Pek knows about it but decided to drive it to the nearest petrol station or tyre shop leh.
Me : But I think its damaging for the tyre’s rim right? If it’s a motorbike then its ok but this is a car.
Florence : Never mind, just stay where you are.
* After passing the traffic light and the first petrol station *
Me : Hey, looked at this Ah Pek, he just passed by the petrol station and did not stop.
* In front of the tilted one side car, the car was moving like an imbalance bullock cart *
Me : Doesn’t he feel anything on the stirring. He should feel something right?
Florence : Yeah hor… wait lar, maybe in front there is tyre shop for cars leh? See there’s one in front.
Me : Ok.
* the car move passed the tyre shop and still moved on *
Me : I think he doesn’t know he has a flat tyre. Maybe I can drive next to it and you can tell the Ah Pek.
Florence : Ok
* Florence make some sign to Ah Pek *
Me : Ok ar?
Florence : No lar, his face like eat shit only. Black as though someone stepped on his tail.
Me : Maybe he knew someone punctured his tyre and now he is like a sour-pus.
Florence : Let him be lar.
Me : Ok.
* Suddenly the Ah Pek nearly hit a car *
Me : Ok, this Ah Pek got a lot of problem
Florence : I better draw a sign and let him know.
* Ah Pek was driving faster and sped off into the busy street of SS2 *
Me : No need lar Low Poh, Ah Pek is gone. I wonder what is wrong with that Ah Pek?
Florence : Hahahahahaha… he is really a joker…
Ladies and gentlemen, always check your tyres before you drive. Have it pump for air and make sure there is no foreign object sticking to your tyres. Also ensure that your spare tyre is well pump and well taken care. Otherwise, you will end up like that Ah Pek driving with a flat tyre. By the way, if you had not change a tyre before you might want to consider taking one day to do it. At least, you will know what to do in case of emergency.
Is sky the limit…no, drives well and love your tyres.
Wednesday, March 01, 2006
This time it make me think whether our taxi stand is strategically located for customers to use. I just couldn't see the reason why customer won't go to that taxi stand and hail a taxi the correct way. Its just in front of them metres away (very nearby).
Also, why couldn't taxi drivers just advice the customer to go to a taxi stand nearby so they could conduct their deal safely? Just imagine the time taken to negotiate and getting in the taxi while the whole wide world for these two gentlemen! So inconsiderate!
All these nonsense and dangers of stopping in the middle of the road to pick a customer or customer hailing a cab when there is taxi stand nearby is really seriously hogging and jamming the traffic. Imagine 4 cars in front had to stop for it to get customer and another 5 or more cars behind him stop.
Should we blame:
1. The municipals or developers for not strategically locating the taxi stand?
2. The customer who does not know where to hail a taxi properly?
3. The taxi driver themselves who stop dangerously at anywhere to get customer?
Me : Give me two plates of fried pork with tomato sauce rice (kou lou yuk fan), add fried eggs ok?
Si Tau Poh (the restaurant owner's wife) : Both?
Me : Yes and make it 100% fried.
Si Tau Poh : Ok.
* After 15 minutes waited, she came with our order *
Si Tau Poh : That will be RM10.50. Those fried eggs cost each RM0.70. Gas increase ok?
Me : * looked at both fried eggs * ... o_O"
Florence : Oi, pay lar...
Me : * grumble grumble - paid the lady boss *
Si Tau Poh : sorry sorry... * Quickly leave our table *
* fui fui hei hei (dreadfully) eat my lunch with a blackened face *
is sky the limit... what else is increasing?!