Tuesday, May 30, 2006

My Elder Cousin Sister - Part 1 (Smoking)

Some conversation on smoking with my elder cousin sister about smoking:

CS: Eh you don’t smoke ar? Many guys smoke.
Me: No I don’t. Why do you ask?

CS: It seem strange that you don’t smoke when every guy I met smokes a lot.
Me: Well, I just don’t smoke.

CS: You go out with friends, they smoke ar?
Me: Yes, some of them…

* Generally, I don’t like people smoking in front of me. I don’t care if my boss smokes and I have to smoke to get a promotion or project. You can very well give it other person if you want me to smoke *

CS: They don’t offer it to you?
Me: No they don’t. They know I am not a smoker.

CS: Hmmm… you have any reason on your part why you are not influenced to smoke too?
Me: I don’t get the feel of wanting to smoke when I see my friends puffing but with history of bad coughs since very young. Smoking… I will think twice of it.

CS: I see…
Me: If I smoke I think I am long gone and my cough would have killed me a long time. I still remember my time in uni when all my friends, ALL, smoke non-stop. I very much hate it but I just bear with it. But they won’t smoke in my room because I told them so.

CS: I see…
Me: But there will be some who wouldn’t listen to me. There was once, a friend came to my apartment and he wants to smoke. So I politely asking him to go out and smoke; not in here. He insisted he will just smoke by the window and don’t want to go out. I was very disappointed. If you think of it, it is my apartment and I don’t like people smoking in here/ As long as your feet is in here, you better don’t smoke. Within my private sanctuary, you have to follow my rules.

CS: So what happen to the friend?
Me: He grumbly walked out and went down.

CS: Wah!
Me: But that wasn’t the end of it. At that same time, I’ve got another friend who was using the toilet. This friend is a real hardcore smoker. I’ve known him since my uni years. He loves to smoke and he smoked in my toilet. I felt so pissed off! You know, I have specifically told them not to smoke. I was so disappointed with them. One wanted to smoke in my living room and another just did it in my toilet. I seriously hate it. That toilet was filled smoke stench. I had to deodorized it and I can’t used it for three days.

CS: Wah!
Me; My lungs are not that good, you have to understand, because if my cough comes back it will be months before it stops. Therefore, I really much hate it. But there are my good friends and they should respect my home and not smoked in there.

CS: Yes, its true. No respect…
Me: If my sons and daughters smoked in the house, I will give them two tight slaps.
Me: Tell me one good reason why do you want to smoke in the first place?
CS: Friends influence, age of innocence, when everything is new and you want to try it out.

Me: Yes it is true but I don’t think youngster when it comes to smoking they don’t think twice of themselves and other people. Its good to smoke but do it in a way that you don’t harm other peoples’ health. Smoking cause cancer to the smoker themselves and second hand smoke kills too. Tell me, why do you think government and health organizations spend millions on campaign to tell people not to smoke? Because its dangerous. Yet people don’t care and carry on. Nowadays, people just don’t care and more young girls are into smoking. Yes, girls smoking looks cool but to me it is bad. Mind me, whenever I see girls smoke, it is really a turn off. Still, I have friend’s girlfriend smoking. They smoke and smoke… just like a chimney pot. You smoke ar?
CS: Hahahahaha… no lar…

Me: Don’t you dare start smoking in front of me…
CS: Nooo lar… I don’t smoke!

Me: Ok ok… hehehehehe…

My dear readers, smoking kills. Yes, you can go ahead and smoke as many sticks as you like in one day but you must remember when you come to visit me at my apartment please be warned that it is no smoking zone. Smokers who caught smoking in my apartment’s perimeter will be shot! Respect that decision of mine – no smoking in my apartment!

Is sky the limit… I think smoking should be ban!

Bloody... Bloody...

This few weeks of night out I noticed crazy people driving like rushing for their funeral.

There was this incident happen just outside MidValley. I was on crossing the fly over into PJ when this stupid car came very near behind me. It was blaring me with its bright lights. Fine, it is fine that you tail me nearly signal me to the go one side for you to pass.

TO THAT BLOODY FUCKING STUPID MOTHERFUCKER WHO OVERTAKE ME ON A SMALL LANE FLYOVER,

DO YOU BLOODY FUCKING HAVE ANY FUCKING BRAINS? YOU ARE CROSSING A BLOODY FLYOVER WITH JUST ONE BLOODY LANE FOR ONE BLOODY CAR AND IT HAS A VERY BLOODY DEEP CURVE! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TRYING TO BLOODY PROVE? I WON’T MIND IF YOU BLOODY CRASH INTO THE BLOODY DIVIDER AND FELL ONTO ANOTHER BLOODY HIGHWAY BELOW. YOU CAN BLOODY DIE WHILE OVERTAKING AND FORCING MY CAR TO ONE SIDE ON THIS BLOODY FLYOVER. I DO NOT KNOW WHERE THE BLOODY HELL YOU ARE HEADING TO BUT MY BEST GUESS YOU ARE RUSHING FOR YOUR BLOODY FUNERAL. BEEPING ME IS NO USE BECAUSE YOU ONLY PROVE YOURSELF ONE BLOODY PIECE OF SHIT WHICH IS EVEN WORSE THEN A BLOODY COW DUNG! IF YOU WANT TO OVERTAKE ME, YOU CAN ALWAYS BLOODY HELL WAIT FOR ME TO GET OFF THE FUCKING FLYOVER OR YOU CAN BLOODY FLY OVER MY CAR. THEN YOU CAN BLOODY HELL GO AND DIE IN OTHER BLOODY LANE. SOME BLOODY HELL KUALA LUMPUR DRIVERS REALLY EAT SHIT IN THEIR DRIVING SKILL! WHY DON’T YOU BLOODY GO FUCK YOURSELF AND BLOODY CRASH INTO THE SEA BECAUSE YOU ARE A BLOODY DISGRACE TO THE NATION!

TO ALL OTHER FUCKING ROAD BULLIES ON THE ROAD, YOU ARE A BLOODY MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU BLOODY BETTER GO EAT SHIT!

HAM KAH CHAN, DUI NIA SING! LEI KOON CHI HUI TAU THOI AR? SEI FUN CHEONG!


I do not curse in my blog, but this time some KL drivers really pissed me off!

Is sky the limit… sei fan cheong char tou kum mai! Lei hum mai sik si tai?

Mom spearheading for me...

Being from an all boys school when I was in my primary till secondary, I am always shy in front of the other gender. Girls. Maybe I don’t have much exposure or experience talking to them and importantly being friends with them. So whenever I see a girl at that time, I will keep quiet, blush and then shy. But then girls are so playful, talkative and naughty. For me, being the boy, you must have think that I am the most naughtiest kid in school then you are wrong. I was a quiet boy and who cry all the time. The slightest prank from my friend will make me cry. One day, things took a turn, instead of being shy and always crying. I felt bolder when I went into my secondary. I approach girls whenever they are. Regardless, the waitress, the girl in the bus next to me, my piano concert partner or even sales girls in the mall.

Scene 1: Salesgirl
Me: Hi, looks like sales here are quite quiet.
Beautiful Salesgirl: Yup. What to do? Market is bad.
Me: I see. My name is William. What’s yours?
Beautiful Salesgirl: hehehehe… My name is A. Is that your mother trying out the new clothes?
Me: Yup. I am on school holiday.
Beautiful Salesgirl: I know… kids like you is very rare to follow mom buy clothes.
Me: hehehehe…

Comment: Ok, this is fine as I was like 13 only and very thin with huge spectacles. So you can imagine it how innocent I look. * Don’t laugh! *

Scene 2: Salesgirl Again
Me: Hi
Beautiful Salesgirl: Hi
Me: Can I be your friend?
Beautiful Salesgirl: You crazy?! Go away!

Comment: Ok, this is not fine if you are 20 years old and not as cute as a young kid anymore. So better think twice before someone gets panic and scream for help.

Scene 3: Salesgirl, YES, its salesgirl again
Mom: So, you want to know that salesgirl. Let me take a look at her!

* My mom walks over pretending to look at clothing then walk back *

Mom: Eh, not bad… very beautiful! Wanna give a try?
Me: No lar… just kidding. Nanti kena scolding or make police report!

Mom: Don’t worry, mom will go ask for you!
Me: o_O”””” Eh no need lar.. you gila ar…

Mom: Aiya just go there be friend mar…
Me: You don’t be crazy nanti people misunderstood you that you are trying to matchmake her with your son!

Mom: Am I? Oh yes…
Me: Damn…

Comment: No comment… my mom is open… very open…

Now that when I see a salesgirl or salesman, I just walk away. Why? I don’t want them to bug me into buying things. If my wife read this surely, my dinner’s topic will be on this until bedtime.

Well, those were the days when you are young between 13 and 21 and everything is so new and you want to know more. Young and dangerous. Fast and furious. Sometimes when I think back I felt I am so old. Life has to move on. I met my wife in a clinic and that is another story.

If you are one of those single guys out there would want to know the lady that
you always wanted to know whether its in a club or in any place. This is what
you can do for a start. It is nice and it is polite.


You can say, ”Hi, how are you?”



Is sky the limit… Hi my name is Bond, James Bond…

Maid, You've Got News!

It’s the time to celebrate for maids who are going to work in Malaysia or those who are working here currently. Laws has been passed and maids can retaliate back if their employers mistreat, abuse or take advantage on them.

Scenario 1: Employer trying to keep half of their maids’ pay
Employer: Your salary I keep half first, when you finish you contract I return everything to you.
Maid: Sorry sir, your laws required that you deposit my salary into my bank account. If not I can bring you to your makhamah! Thank you sir, here is my Bank Harimau account number.

Scenario 2: Employer abuse maid
Employer: Take this! You pig! How dare you not do chores! Take this! * slapping her with a hot steel spatula *
Maid: * Coolly avoided her employer’s attack with a single hand * Your makhamah says I can bring you to court for abuse. Thank you madam, here is my lawyer letter. I see you in court!

Scenario 3: Maid negotiating with employer before work start
Employer: So when can you start work?
Maid: I can start next week but I have a few following condition that you will need consider and put it in black and white; contract or agreement. Here is the list of condition. Thank you sir. Please you will have to make your decision today because I have another offer around this neighborhood.



Is sky the limit… if you are a maid, do you feel happy and relief?

What should i do... ? Hmmm...

Now that my wife is in Federal Territory of Labuan. If you do not know where is this place then you should look up in Google. Yes, Google provides all the answer. If you hate Google then go look up in your world map or your secondary text book Geography.

Labuan is a Federal Territory of Malaysia and it is not in West Peninsular of Malaysia but a very small island in the East of Malaysia between Sarawak and Sabah. In the map, you will only see it as a dot. Yes, its just a small island but it is surrounded by oil rigs. She will be there for two weeks and I will have so much of my time to be alone and do what I want in my apartment. Argh!!! I am starting to miss her.

Let me see what I should do while she is away:

1. Gangbang Party… ? Then we invite CEO and COM over to my place. Maybe I can tape both of them and sell it to the pirates of DVD... hehehhehehe....
2. Invite all the girls to my apartment… ? Hmmm… how much money do I have? Nah...
3. Open an all nude party in my apartment… ? Hmmm… what if all guys turn up only… no! no! no! this is out!

Nah, I don’t think so. Most probably I just eat and sleep and continue with my ANIME. I am watching Full Metal Panic (first series) and will try to complete it before she comes back. Otherwise, it will be all Korean and Japanese dramas!



Is sky the limit… what should I do? I miss you, Sayang!

Davinci, X Men III and Ian Mckellen

This two weeks I have watched two good movies. One that raise Jesus issue and another mutant issue. Of these two movies, Jesus as according to the book written by none other than popular Dan Brown to have a descendant. The latter, many main characters will die and leaving the epic of X-men to the rest. However, I was told to sit until the end of the credits to see something special. Unfortunately, I couldn’t wait to that last end of the credit. Therefore I assumed something mystery is about to happen; most probably Professor X are revived or Jean Grey returns from the dead. Still I could not just make this assumption. Most probably I will buy the DVD when it comes out to know what happen. Or, I go and ask some X-Men fans on that particularly scene.

Back to The Davinci Code, it has been rated 18PL because of its story depicting Jesus having descendent and Mary Magdalene is the holy grail that defy the Christian’s faith and belief. Pretty exciting for such a movie to come out from Hollywood despite outcry from churches who are against this movie. Malaysia’s churches has done its best to educate its members before they watch it. As far as it goes in my point of understanding, the Davinci Code movie and the book won’t affect my mind and my thinking of the Christian faith. After all, if this movie were so much giving a lot of negative influence then they should have ban the book in the beginning. Many have read it and the books are selling like hot cakes even before the movie were in the making. That is my view. Period. Ian Mckellen portrays as the Teacher who is the mastermind behind the plot to get the truth out from top members of Priory of Sion on the Holy Grail. He is a fine actor and he has shown both of his talented acting skill in both X-Men movies and the Davinci Code. However, he will still be best remember and regarded as Gandalf in the movie Lord of The Rings trilogy. I surely hope to see more of him from many genres of movies coming soon in the future.

It was really fun watching him swinging his hands to flip away convoy police cars to rescue Mystique.

Apart the movies, I must say the tickets sold are very expensive and I felt that the rates are going higher and higher with each good movies coming into Malaysia. GSC in Midvalley are selling X-Men tickets for RM12 each. Yes, you may argued, “Hey bro, its Midvalley lar… of coz its expensive lar”. Though I don’t have much concrete fact to argue that movie tickets are getting expensive but I still beg to differ that prices should vary on the cinema location. How much will the ticket cost for the new Superman Return? I will definitely compare the prices. I wonder how cinemas in Malaysia determine movie ticket’s prices?

In the lift after the Davinci Code movie:

One Ah Beng: Hey, that movie condemning Jesus ar?
Ah Beng’s Stylish and Dyed Red Hair Girlfriend: I don’t know wor…

* After the Ah Beng couple left the lift *


My wife: I think they should read the book first and understand its just fiction…
Me: Well, there are some people who, “follow the crowd, do what the crowd does”.

So much of Dan Brown’s hype for the past two weeks… I am getting sick of hearing his name everywhere I go! I need to detoxify and prepare for Superman Returns.



Is sky the limit… The grace and fall of Professor X and the X-Men

Thursday, May 25, 2006

Of dreams and PowerPoint...

Last two mornings, this was what i heard after i woke up:

Wife: Ah Sei, I dreamt I had finished my PowerPoint slides, saved and burned into a CD. Then, when I wanted to display it out from the CD…half of my slides’ images are gone… I was so frustrated and my classmates helped me till late afternoon to fix the CD…

Ah Sei: Wah, PowerPoint so jialat… eh, hold on… CD can be fix ar? How?

Wife: I don’t know… but they all fix it and I cried lar…

Ah Sei: Oh poor girl… so I decided to write an email to Microsoft or Mr. Gates.

Dear Mr Gates of Microsoft,


It is good to let you, Mr Gates, know that your good product Microsoft PowerPoint is wonderful and powerful too. People who are not oriented with the PowerPoint product manages to use it with minimal tutorial from the professionals. However, your very good product still lack one important thing that will surely make my wife more happier than ever.


Your product is giving my wife nightmares and it is a pain to see her complaining to me that she dreamt of your product giving her problem. As a result, she cried in her dreamt because of your Power Point is not Dream Safe. Dream Safe in a sense is a feature that I think of today and it can help you to improve your product in a better way and user will feel less stress and making their dream more beautiful. Dream Safe feature as I called it involves a button that will maintain all features including behaviors, objects, methods and classes of Power Point to be guaranteed in the event of transferring to another storage media. Therefore, users like my wife who has no information technology skills will dream better when they sleep.

Dream Safe feature is unique creation of mine. Dream Safe feature is my idea and I won’t mind receiving some royalty from Microsoft due to my contribution to improve your product.


Yours Sincerely,
William Wilstroth
ISTL 2006 EP 2 Management

Damn Microsoft PowerPoint for making my wife cried in her dream…



Is sky the limit… I dreamt of SAP… rox!

Guy having PMS

Being siao is one thing but feeling piss-off can be hazardous or I am just having PMS:

Me 2: Eh how is your week?
Me 1: Aiya… like that lar…

Me 2: How lar…? At least say something like syok ka, shit ka, bored ka…
Me 1: My week is full of shit… and everywhere I go I meet and talk about shit… when I sit down I see shit… then I go for lunch I eat the same shit…

Me 2: Aiya… be open and relax lar… and appreciate the days you have lar…
Me 1: You are full of shit… * punch Me 2 *

Me 3: Hey, hold it lar brother… * Me 3 hold me back from punching Me 2 *
Me 1: You get out of my way… or I punch you too…

Me 3: ok ok man… just calm down * both hands off and walk back *
Me 2: what is your problem man…?

Me 1: My problem is full of shit…
Me 3: Get a grip… what about home?

Me 1: That is where I have my solace… and peace…
Me 2: Then go home and be with your wife… make love… read books… cook… lar…

Me 1: There are things where man needs to be in the field and strive… with idiots…
Me 3: I see… what is making your blood boil?

Me 1: Seeing idiots on the road and in my field…
Me 2: Think of it as a balance lar… if everybody is smart then there will be no challenge lar… must have some idiots baru syok mar…

Me 1: … * took a butcher knife and hacked me 2 to death *
Me 3: my god! You just murdered me 2…

Me 3: What are you doing? Don’t come near me… please… have mercy!
Me 1: I’m sorry you have just witness a murder… I’m sorry… * Kabuushhhhh! *


Me 1: Now I am satisfied… and now it’s all those idiots turn…

* carry on with my field’s assignment *


is sky the limit... i feel like chopping idiots using a butcher's knife!

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Its a lady driver!... haiya!...

Again, it strike again for the second or the third time. I can remember since which entry that i had uttered, "Its a woman!". Nevertheless, my mouth never fails me.


One evening after fetching my wife and on the way home:


Me: How is your last paper?
Wife: Good... hehehehe... we can go see Davinci Code today... yeah!


Me: Yup... hopefully... we are able to buy the ticket today.
Wife: Its a must! Its my turn! Not fair every day that movie is full! Its my turn! Its my turn!


Me: ok ok...


* Then there is car overtake me and slows down *


Me: Hmmm... so slow... * I slowed down too *


* After 30 seconds or so... *


Me: Ayo... why so slow... in front no car lah...
Wife: * Happily reading Dan Brown's book *


Me: Moved lar... in front of you no car lar...
Wife: * Happily reading Dan Brown's book *


Me: No wonder its a lady! Drive so slow...


* Teng! 3... 2... 1... Kaboom *


Wife: So you have forgotten lar... you want me to repeat to you about woman... huh huh... yalar... all women drivers are slow... i know i am don't dare to drive... yak yak yak...

Me: hehehehhee... no lar no lar... i mean the lady in front lar... not all women including you. If you drive... you are the best...
Wife: that's more like it...


I swear to god... next time i must stress as "the driver" instead "its a lady"... damn... i feel that i am discriminating all the ladies.


But its a fact, some ladies drives like they are going for their last days or they are too slow like they owned the damn road.


Moreover, I don't really accept PMS being the reason for their actions on the road.


Siao!



is sky the limit... dun drive so slow lar! drivers...

Friday, May 19, 2006

Silence of the Lamb

In a random chat with Lord Jeff on my MSN message:

Lord Jeff says:new movie?
Me says:which new movie?

Me says:yes COM is the jodie foster...
Me says:kong will be the hannibal lecter

Me says:i am the director
Me says:you want to be producer?

Me says:jeeva can be the stunt manager..
Me says:we can take location in kepong...

Me says:some stunts along MRR2 and the final scene in COM's bedroom which it will be steamy...


is sky the limit... me siao!

Thursday, May 18, 2006

Kamsiap Kamsiap...

Recently, after been awarded by the department:

Thumbelina: eh, belanja lar...
Me: hmmm... i need to consider that...

Thumbelina: no need lar...
Me: I will need to decide whether to use cash or coinbox to pay for your food...

Me: roti canai kosong can ar?
Thumbelina: ok ok...

Me: Ok... 1 sen, 2 sen, 3 sen...
Thumbelina: o_O"

Me: ok ok lar... if you want... come to AMCORP Mall lar...
Thumbelina: Wah so far and expensive for one roti!!

She is kamsiap! I pay for food and drinks and she complain far and expensive. Hahahahahaha...

is sky the limit... thumbelina kamsiap!

Sudoku Fever

This few weeks I am hooked on Sudoku. Yes, that crazed 9 by 9 boxes to be filled up by numbers from 1 to 9. Its really interesting and mind challenging. You can just sit down for hours thinking to put numbers correctly into it.

Low poh: Ah sei, can ar? See… See… 8 lar…
Me: wei… wei… you do yours lar…

Low poh: hehehehehe… its already 5 minutes…
Me: wei… wei… shhh… shhh…

Low poh: * peek peek *
Low poh: Ah sei, 9 ar…

Me: * look at her – don’t know to cry or to laugh *
Low poh: ahahahahahahahaha… who ask you to do that to me in the first place!

Me: * mumbling mumbling *
Low poh: * giggle laugh laugh giggle laugh laugh *

* after one hour *

Me: Yehaaa! I’m done… low poh… I’m done… low poh…
Low poh: zzzzzzzzz * its midnight *



Is sky the limit… 9… 8… 2… 4… 1… 2… * scratch head *

Potluck Brainstorming Session

One of the longest brainstorming session for a coming potluck session:

Padme: Will, you got any idea what type of finger food I should be bringing to the coming potluck?
Me: Hmmm…

TC: * looks at us and join in *
Kerry: * giggling * yeah yeah… I also need to know… * move her chair closer *

Me: maybe you can do some spaghetti…
TC: yeah, you just boil and buy a can of spaghetti sauce and put in some chopped mushroom…

Padme: Hehehehe… difficult lar…
Me: What?! Like that you call difficult…

Padme: Ok, why don’t you make spaghetti since you said you always bring spaghetti to work…
Me: No way! My spaghetti is only for me lar… you want the whole office to try spaghetti with peanut butter sauce?

Padme, TC and Kerry: * laugh *
TC: maybe you can just bring fishball…

Padme: No lar… its too troublesome… have to boil… anything that does not need me to step into the kitchen?
TC: Hmmm…

Me: Hmmm… maybe you can go to Tesco or Carrefour to get half roasted chicken… you just take away the half and remember to ask them to chop it up.
Padme & Kerry: Wah!

Kerry: Have to put overnight can ar?
Me: Can.. you can always heat it up in the company’s microwave…

Padme: no no no… * laugh laugh *
TC: Ah… I remember Gavin make egg sandwich. Its easy. Make 4 hard boil eggs, squash it, put some salt, and spread it onto the sandwich.

Padme: Huh? Boil egg… hehehehe… ayo… I don’t want to go into the kitchen lar…
Me: Oh my god… girls nowadays are really… lazy



Padme & Kerry: What are you trying to say, William?
Me: … I mean lucky that they can wait for their husband to cook for them… * hehehehe *

TC: * laugh laugh *
Padme: yeah…

Kerry: * giggle giggle *
Me: Okay, you don’t want to go into kitchen…so lets us now gather and brainstorm what should be the best food to bring straight from the Tesco…

Padme: Tesco? Eh you got no other place to suggest is it?
TC: Aiya.. he lives near Tesco lar…. * laugh laugh *

TC: If that is the case, you can opt for sandwich…
Padme: Hmmm… ok I settle for sandwich…

Me: Ok… TC is bringing seedless grapes… Padme bringing egg sandwich… ok then…
Kerry: wait wait… me… me… not yet leh… * hands flying everywhere *

Me, TC and Padme: ok ok…
Me: How about mee goreng?

Kerry: * looked at me wanted to cry *
Me: ok ok… just joking…. How about Tesco’s roasted chicken… buy half and chop it…

Kerry: * hands flying * huh no no no…. * everybody start laughing *
Padme: Please William… no more Tesco… I am going to kill you…

TC: How about fishball… you can go to Cold Storage and buy those cold packs and you can boil it at night.
Kerry: Hmmm… go into kitchen ar?

Me: Yup… oh yeah… you rent a room…
Kerry: No no no… I can use the kitchen… but will it be difficult?

TC: Nope, just boil it and put it in the Tupperware after that…
Me: Yeah… talking about fishball… you can get some Yong Tau Foo also…

Kerry: o_O”””” argh….. no no no….
Me: ok ok… hahahahahahaha… * I like to bully Kerry *

Me: * I mimic her – I hold my jacket collar and hid my face and say no no no *
Padme: Why are you so bad, William? Leave her alone…

TC: * Laugh *
Me: hehehe… I am bad…

Me: ok lar… you can buy some M&Ms and some Nachos… mix together…
Padme: o_O”””

Padme: Ok ok William… go one side… don’t come near us…
TC: * laugh *… hold on… I think nachos will be a good idea… I think Kerry can do that… just buy some nacho sauce… eat and dip… perfect finger food…

Padme: Yeah… hmmm… ok…. William you can come back now…
Me: hehehehe… my idea cool right?

Me: Then u can just have a bowl of M&Ms on one side…
Padme & TC: * laugh *

Padme: You and your M&Ms!
Kerry: I guess Nachos and sauce wouldn’t be so bad. But, will they eat it?

Me: Don’t worry, you got TC and me… the biggest bin in the world…
Padme & Kerry: * laugh *

Me: Unless, you still consider that is troublesome… you can try bringing in durians!
TC: * laugh * Mr Oon will come looking for you!

Padme: * laugh *
Me: Or, you can try Bak Kut Teh…

Kerry: * laugh * Hasni cannot eat lar.. must be Halal…
Padme: * laugh * you can make Chic Kut Teh…

TC & Me: * laugh – Four thumbs up! *
Kerry: * giggle giggle * ok ok I bring nachos and sauce…

TC, Padme and Me: Yeah!!



Is sky the limit… girls, don’t go into your kitchen… its dangerous

Monday, May 15, 2006

Sometimes I feel like punching salesperson...

Some salespersons can be very persistent when it comes to introducing and selling their products and some have bad mouths. Still, I praised them for their bravery and patience having to be told off by customers in harsh or cold way because they need to make a living. Respect. Unfortunately, their method sometimes make me very angry and resorted to harsh and cold treatment. It is not my fault to treat salesperson badly because they asked for it. I was at this coffeeshop having my breakfast with my parents and brothers.


Salesperson: Uncle... uncle... your car use what motor oil ar? My one here very good. See this oil on the table.


* pointing to a brochure stuck on the table *


Salesperson: The wan tan mee and curry mee seller are using it. Its very good. All of them say very good. It makes your engine very clean and last longer. I am not lying to you. You can asked them.
My dad: No no, no thank you...


Salesperson: Don't believe ar? Don't worry, very cheap! See the information. No tipu wan. Try lar... the wan tan mee seller is using it.
My dad: * kept silent and everyone hoping he will walk away *


Salesperson: uncle... believe me lar... its very good... you see this oil is better than the market out there. Trust me. Its good. Its worth your money.

* Me cannot tahan anymore *


Me: No thanks, we are not interested in this.
Salesperson: You don't believe me? You will come back to me when you realize this good product.


Me: * Looked at him * I said I do not want. * Clenching my fork *
Salesperson: You will believe me one day...


* He walks away with face black and not even a word of thank you *


* After finishing my meal 15 minutes *


My dad and my mom holding me back: Leave him alone son... he is pretty bruised up already.. you beat him some more... he is going to die... leave him... don't... he is just working to earn a living... let him live...


Me: What the fuck! I say i am not interested... You bloody hell wanna pick a fight iszit... when people say no thank you and wish you to leave us alone.. your fucking face still linger on and say stupid things... Wan tan mee sellers buy your damn product... so?... ptui! I am fucking irritated by your sales talk!


No, i did not punch him in the face. Just the feeling of doing it. Its the kind of thing when people say no politely and he still stood there and talk cock to me. Yes, you have sold those oils to wan tan mee and curry mee sellers. So? I don't give a damn that your oil can fly a car or shoot up to the moon. What do you mean that i don't believe you? Yes i bloody well do not believe you. I only believe in my fulfilling my stomach after a tiring game of badminton that morning. Yes, you can make me believe in you by giving me one free sample. Otherwise, fuck you!


Its just the fact that i do not want it. Therefore, please understand the word NO. It means I am not interested in buying anything that you want to sell and i will not take my wallet and give you money. You can just walk off and try other customers.



is sky the limit... when people say NO.. just bloody hell walk away ok?

JPJ DOs and DONTs in Car Mutation...

On Sunday Star newspaper, it reported that Government are outlining guidelines on car modifications. A list of DO's and DON'T were published and car owners are to adhere to this JPJ guideline and its about time.

I agreed with this DOs and DON'Ts and i have one thing that i really do not like when car owners mutate their cars with a huge pair of dorsal fins.

I have come across many cars with that mutated feature. According to the article in the Star paper, people who cannot afford expensive cars generally modified their cars to get attention. Get attention my arse! I have seen maniacs put huge spoilers at their back of their expensive cars like BMW and those spoilers are as huge as a tail of an aeroplane. What are they trying to prove?

Do you think the BMW car can go faster than the original design by putting a huge spoiler? Boleh Terbang ar? Damn!

If my PERODUA Service Centre asked me to put spoiler:

Mekanik: Abang, mau spoiler tak? Kita ada diskaun...
Me: Spoiler? Ok... ada apa spoiler?


Mekanik: Spoiler roket ada.. spoiler kapal terbang ada... spoiler F1 ada... macam macam ada...
Me: Ok... bagi itu spoiler yang macam kat bawah kapal layar (dorsal fin of a sailing yacht) punya.. itu you letak atas tengah-tengah wa punya Kancil 660... lagi besar lagi baik... eh.. kalau boleh... ia boleh tarik masuk dan keluar... lagi best... sini ada jual nitro ar?


Mekanik: ...



is sky the limit... let's put nitro in Kancils 660!... really ngon kui!

Friday, May 05, 2006

Meh G noodle, Kang Ka ruus, little Koi la Bear…

When I was a student in Sydney I had to be careful with my expenditure. Money sent from my dad was limited and sufficiently enough for one month. If I decided, one day, to spent more then my very last week of the month is Maggie (pronounced as Meh G in Sydney) noodle for lunch and dinner. At that time it was like I wish Kmart, WalMart and Target had Cintan noodles or something that can be found in Ipoh. Unfortunately, they did not have those beloved Malaysian dry food sold in their stores.

One of my worse habit I acquire for the first four months was I had to calculate and convert each time I need to buy something. Regardless if it is food or just stationery you would see me using my mobile phone (not handphone in Sydney) to calculate the conversion.

Me: Wah, that A4 paper cost AUD2.50… hmmm let me calculate first… * mobile phone whipped out *

Me: Wah, wan tan mee cost AUD4.50… hmmm let me calculate first… * mobile phone whipped out *

Me: Wah, movie ticket cost AUD8.00… hmmm let me calculate first… * mobile phone whipped out *

Me: Wah, haircut cost AUD12.00… hmmm let me calculate first… * mobile phone whipped out *

Me: Wah, masuk Taronga Zoo cost AUD12.00… hmm let me calculate first whether its worth watching kang ka roosss… * mobile phone whipped out *

One day, my uncle just cannot tahan…

Uncle: Wah beh tahan… you calculate calculate… please mate… you will be here for three years! Lu sudah masuk tiga bulan di sini masih mau kira ka?… If you do that each time when you want to buy something… like that no need to makan and hidup anymore… just be reasonable and don’t simply spend lar… why you need to convert… money not enough then come see uncle mar… haiya uncle give lar…here here… take take… go go.. enjoy movie.. enjoy makan… anything… Like that how you can find a Aussie girlfriend here ar? Beh tahan you! Don’t know how my sister teach his son and the father also satu macam… always scare the son… yak yak yak... blah blah blah… yak yak yak…

Me: hehehehe… * taking the money * thank you uncle… * really paiseh *

By the way, my uncle is a permanent resident in Australia and he had lived in Sydney for a very long time since I was 10 years old. Now that I am already 26 years old, you can imagine how long he has been there with the kang ka ruuuusss and koi la little bears….



Is sky the limit… cute koi la bears… and kang ka roooss...

Wednesday, May 03, 2006

Ultraviolet

My mind just struck. Unique idea! Perhaps Malaysia’s next haze attack we can use this type of nose filter from Ultraviolet. Let’s call it Daxus Haze Nose Filter. Malaysia Boleh!

Milla Jovovich, a beautiful and sexy actress and a real tough lady. Strong in action pack movie characters like The Fifth Element, Resident Evil 1 and 2. Unfortunately the character in her latest action movie installment is really wasted. No doubt she suits many character that portrays sexy and hard core butt kicking heroine but the movie effects has not turned out any of her core competency acting element.

Ultraviolet’s story in the first half was terrific but towards the part when she met the small boy it bores me down to slumber land. Period.

Special effects were good but not enough and the idea of her clothing changing color according to her mood and environment seems to be similar to Aeon Flux. I can’t remember if her clothing were like in Aeon Flux. This include her hair color too. I wonder when this really will happen to human. Probably when it does, I will see girls’ hair color in Bangsar start to change from bar to bar.

In the Star paper, one reviewer wrote that the bad guy Daxus’s nose looked like a salt shaker because he wore a metallic filter at his breathing hole. Truly but every time he came out I just couldn’t stop looking at his bloody nose. Why is he be the only one not wearing mask like his other henchmen? His henchmen could have worn that same salt shaker or whatever that nose filter is called. His nose just stood out in every scene. I must say that the metallic nose filter reminds me of my grandmother’s tea bag holder. Moreover, my friend Gavin also had one tea leaves filter that looked similar like it.

As a result, I will give Milla Jovovich a B but a C for the whole entire movie.

Dear god, I am giving an A to the nose filter or whatever it is called and congratulations to that person who invented that in the comic eventually brought it into the film then exposed to people like me. He ought to be hire by Malaysia as their next inventor or automobile designer.

Is sky the limit… Milla Jovovich still rocks! And a nose filter…

Car Wash... Car Wash...

Usually I wash my car once a month and yes I am lazy to wash it every weekend (hey, I still love my car and I rely on him everyday and outings). Each time I wash my car, it will take me 2 hours. I will spray, foam, spray and wipe then massage it and also give it extra services like every massage girl does upon request. Alright, I make that up. I do not massage my car. Kancil can go look for another female Kancil. Anyway, after I clean my car then it is polishing time. So at the end, I get a clean Kancil and a sweaty hot owner. Last night, I decided to put off the idea to wash Kancil on my own this coming weekend.

So I went to Mobile Petrol Station’s car wash and I planned to sit in Macdonald for a cup of hot gwai lo tea. Also, I can catch a few glimpse of chicks since my wife is not with me. (If my wife is reading this, please don’t whack me!) The moment to be alone and some chicks to look at; it’s always awesome. Unfortunately, this car wash owned by this Indian guy got his one team of washmen. I was in the car the whole process and less than 30 minutes I got a real clean Kancil.

I was like so shock (my mouth open wide) because I did not get to visit Macdonald to have my hot gwailo tea and watch girls.

First, I was asked to remain in my Kancil. Two men proceed to spray and foam Kancil. Then spray again. Second, it happened so fast that the next moment I was instructed to drive out for wiping. Okay, at this time I thought I maybe able to catch my hot gwai lo tea again and some chicks but there were 5 washmen doing wiping and vacuuming at the same time. Damn, it was so fast.

Boss: Brother that’ll be RM7.
Me: ok ok. Thanks. I did not get to have my hot gwai lo tea and watch chicks!

Boss: Don’t worry. * wink wink * Here is a refund RM2 for that.

Alright I made that up again. I was so surprise by the whole thing. Damn Fast! That evening I drove Kancil home silently. No hot gwai lo tea and no chicks to watch. I am so sad.

Is sky the limit… Fast wash.. no hot gwai lo tea and no girls to look at…

Mr Lipton and the Bitten Cup

It was night and we were waiting for the movie to start. It was a late night movie in Mid-Valley so we decided to buy some drinks from Macdonald.

Mcd Waitress: Hi, having it here or takeaway?
Me: Having it here.

Mcd Waitress: What would you like?
Me: One McFlurry Oreo and one hot Chinese tea.

Mcd Waitress: Huh?! McFlurry Oreo ok but we don’t have hot Chinese tea.
Me: * sheepishly and paiseh * hehehehehe… one hot gwailo tea.

* so we gotten our Mr. Lipton’s hot tea and McFlurry Oreo and gone up to wait *

After 15 minutes or more, I had finish my Mr. Lipton’s hot tea and wanted to have another refill because my throat was a little itchy.

Me: Hi, is it possible to just fill this cup with hot water only? You know, my throat is bad.
Mcd Waitress: ok ok, no problem. * giving me a sweet smile that will melt Ice Age 2 *

* so I handed over my cup to her *



Mcd Waitress: * she looked at my cup *
Me: * Paiseh the second time * Sorry, I loved to bite this Mcd’s plastic tea cup. Hehehe…



Mcd Waitress: o_O” … ok ok…
Me: Hehehehehe….

Nah… none of this paiseh event happen… you think I am so paiseh (embarrassing) ar?


Is sky the limit… Mr Lipton and the bitten cup.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

Checking on my stats

Lately, i did a rain-check on visitor's stats and found this:

hmmm... ok...

hmmm... 40 pageviews generated? I need more tools to verify that...

is sky the limit... stats stats stats

Best Male Song Artist

Who is the best male song artist?
Andy Lau

You don’t know him? You say I am outdated? This is what I got to say to you, “Why don’t you go flush your head in the toilet bowl?” (A good quote from Michael)

Is sky the limit… Andy Lau


Tuition, Getting A's and self study

Note: Long entry on my thoughts. Don't fret or come complaining to me.

Back in my study days, I hardly heard that tuition was a requirement to get As. Nowadays, tuition centers are blooming in every state. Children no longer have their good time to play, run and cycle around the neighborhood like I did in my childhood days. Yes, children today still do that but in a more restricted area like playing PS2 in their own room, going to sport center to play their games or very most likely in the tuition centers. Today’s kid is totally than yesterday’s kid and many issues were popping out in the newspaper lately regarding Malaysia’s education.

Students who are getting as many A’s as possible and each year we noticed the number of As are growing from 7As to 15As. Does A’s really matter? Back in those days, when one obtains 6A’s was seriously really big deal because that person really studies hard for it. What if? Yes, what if one study hard and still get less than that 15A’s? What should the student do? Regret over it? I believe the numbers As only represent a certain merit in a student’s overall performance. Yes, you may get a lot of attention from the public sector particularly the media sector but when it comes to working these A’s does not matter anymore. Exams as far as to the extent to obtain a degree are just a stepping stone to working life.

My story, I never had a great achievement like those in the newspaper in my PMR years and tuition center was just a way to pass my time. At the end of PMR, I totally avoided tuition centers because I just could not concentrate. There were too many distractions and it had not helped me to improve my results. In the end, I decided to attend tuition classes based on my weakest subject. Gradually after some time in my mid form four, I had not attended tuition classes. So I was on my own towards my SPM, with a few advices from school teachers and a mentor, then my final years in the university.

Student should not rely too much on tuition center. You should rely on your own self to learn about one subject. In your later years, your skill to do research will be heavily use in your university years and working too. By that time, you will not be able to find any tuition to help you with your work and your university’s final year projects. Tuition center, in my opinion, has injected more spoon feeding viruses into the mind of already infected students. Getting extra notes or extra work should be on the responsibility of the student. Student should have the initiative to look for extra notes and practices. Tuition center should only serve as a place to give advice only. The work to get extra notes should still fall onto the student’s shoulder.

Teachers are not left out and their responsibility should not just fell onto the tuition center alone to gain profit (extra pocket money). They have an important role to play in the Malaysian education system. Please knock my head if this is not logical. A teacher shouldn’t abandon their role in the school. Otherwise, why waste one time in the school where you can teach better in tuition centers? Tell me, what is the difference between a school class and tuition class? Aren’t they the same? Both of these structures have a teacher to teach and give advice. There still have the big boards to write on. Those attending both of this are students. Read my lips, students my dear readers. Therefore, what make them so different? The notes? The material being teach is different? Else, we can all abolish the school and just setup tuition center all over in Malaysia. What makes the education system in Malaysia so wrong that student have to go to tuition center? I do not think so. I am also a student myself. I do not think that the Malaysian education is lacking. Instead, they need to improve their teacher’s mind and ways of teaching so student can be confident in their studies.


If tuition center is different from the school then it means the teaching is advance, teacher is more caring and there is more opportunity for discussion. Now let’s stop at this point and ask this question yourself, “Don’t the school teachers do this in their own class room?” If you say yes then it means student should not be attending tuition classes and everything is adequately provided in the classroom. If you say no then it means the class is big, a lot of distraction; teacher couldn’t care less, everyone is left on their own; notes and homework are given, but not taken seriously; everybody goes to tuition, its better. I rest my case. Unfortunately, my dear readers I beg to differ. Not all things subject to academic are resolving by attending tuition centers. One day, students will need to get themselves off the habit of spoon feeding and go do more study on their own. It is better for the young ones to study without spoon feeding and we will definitely see more intellectual Malaysians. Sadly, we still see spoon feeding in the university.

I am not saying tuition center is bad but I am trying to point out that it should not be rely by students so much. People should look up to school as their point of academic center to educate their children. Schools regardless if it is private or public should be more united to improve their standard and facility (teaching) to students. I just do not see why students should attend tuition centers so much. I also do not see why tuition centers should get so popular among our academic achievers. Yes, please throw the tuition centers out into the garbage bin, set the student free into the play ground, improve the teacher’s attitude and mind in the school, tell students they should not think A’s so much because there are many things that students need to understand and to learn. Why not? You fear that students without tuition centers will fail terribly and get into nasty things. Tell me my good readers, I think today’s younger generation are smarter but with a little tuning in their head I bet they could come out something more positive than us today. Things today that we see just could not be satisfy and justify with A’s and attending tuition classes.

Sincerely, how many A’s does a student determine obtain? As the years go on the number of A’s increases, how many hours of study does one really need to study to obtain that goal?



Is sky the limit… look ma, I got 20 A’s!

COM and Second Snr. COM

Second Snr. COM: Anywhere companies are the same. Old employees are just sacked and new ones are employ to replace them. Young and energetic plus cheaper. Everyone is a salesperson regardless engineer or technician. Always remember, there is no such thing as job security.
COM: There is one, geisha. Everybody loves f**king.

Me: Yeah, just become a geisha and find an old rich guy. Do him until he dies and take away all his property. Then look for another old f**k and repeat the process. Secure 100%
COM and Second Snr COM: hahahahahahahahahahaha…

Second Snr COM: But geisha still get old right?
Me: Who ask you to work until you are old? Do now and save until the right amount lar. Reach the target then say retired lar. Then on the retirement stage get a stable old man and continue with old life lar. Like that no need to worry about loneliness lar.

COM and Second Snr COM: damn…
Me: What else if you expect a secure job. Sell buttock ka, sell front part ka, sell mulut ka… everything with lubang pun boleh mar… unless you try something unique like lubang hidung or lubang telinga pun boleh… lubang bird bird… want ar?

COM and Second Snr. COM: o_O””” ok ok…


Is sky the limit… selling buttock… Buttock! Buttock! Mari! Mari! RM30 saja! Murah!

Dr's Handwriting

Yesterday evening I did not know what got into me and I asked my wife about doctor’s handwriting.

Me: Do you find it hard to read doctor’s handwriting?
Florence: No and yes, sometimes its quite difficult, different doctors write differently, sometime so small you just can’t read it, but now they are required to write everything in capital letters to overcome that. Normally, surgeons with delicate fingers will write very small.

Me: I see, eh, can show me some doctor’s handwriting ar?
Florence: * scribble scribble *

Me: Wow man, what is that?
Florence: 5D1/2NS, it means 5% gula Melaka and 0.45% garam masak.

Me: Ya kah?!
Florence: Hahahahahaha… no lar it means 5% glucose and 0.45% saline or garam.

Me: I see. What does it do?
Florence: Water for dripping into patient.

After half an hours describing bloods and types of water,

Me: …
Florence: Understood ar?

Me: err… lets just stick H20 and blood is blood. Hehehehe… * I just couldn’t comprehend all those medical terms, functions and effects.

Is sky the limit
… tulisan cacing

Monday, April 24, 2006

No, I don't want anything

If you girls are alone better becareful if you are approach by people who carries a bag and some papers in their hand. You might not know what will happen to you until its too late. Some might be genuine salesperson trying to sell you something. But if you can imagine the scene someone trying to sell you something in a shopping centre like Mines Resort. Just don't make sense.


Here is one incident:


Me: Dear, i am going to put this tray back over there.
Florence: ok.


* i walked over then i turned my head *


Stranger: * talking to Florence showing her a piece of paper and one hand holding a briefcase *
Florence: I don't...

Me: I don't want anything, go away * one hand doing the shoo-ing sign "
Stranger: ok ok... * walked away *


I just don't see that stranger talking to anyone even after i had shoo him away. Strange don't you think. There are so many couples and some alones sitting around and why don't he talk to them. So what is he trying or planning to do to single girls? If you are trying to sell something why don't you stop me and say you need to sell something to me. My first impression will be, "seems to me the guy is trying to con people". Or maybe he doesn't want to attract attention if i decided to make a fuss. Or maybe he is just being polite by responding to someone said no.


Whatever the reason just becareful when you are alone in the shopping plaza or anywhere.


I know times are difficult and some people are resorting to selling on the streets to earn some money. So just becareful.


Remember if you don't want anything, just say firmly: "No thank you, I don't want anything".



is sky the limit... I don't want anything. Go away.




Saturday, April 22, 2006

The Hectic Over.

With the massive heat that permeating through the atmosphere, I successfully lived through to face the last paper on Monday, though, hopefully, go through it with another success or good faith!

Doing nothing else, I clicked, clicked and clicked.

Finally, stopped at ISTL and glanced through it.

"OMG, 'he' become a lecturer? In a million years! Why he wants to be a lecturer?"

"I have no idea where that idea came?"

"Hmm, human is a very complex form, isn't it?"

Maybe, I would be a scientist working in a laboratory, working with a sample of a virus (which I would think it is a T-Virus!). Then, wouldn't it be fun?





[Spending too much time on papers and documents can make someone build castle in the air.
E.g. I want to be a scientist working in Umbrella Inc.!]

Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Me being a lecturer...

I always think of after retirement I will be a lecturer. This morning i had an early dream while driving to work. Yeah I know dreaming and driving is dangerous. But i just couldn't help it. After all, it was still morning.

Being a lecturer, I think I will be a very bad and evil teacher. I can imagine students hating me and calling me names behind my back. But as all my employers and supervisors always said,

"It’s good for you and you should appreciate the opportunity given to you".

So for that I will give my students the same treatment but with added flavor, "Its good for you and you should appreciate the opportunity given to you, don't blame me but blame the industry".

Let’s try to simulate some of my dreams.

Scene 1: Walking into a new class on the first day
Me: Ok, I know we are new and this is your first day in this class. Please study chapter 1 to chapter 5. We will have quiz next week. Our lecturer and student relationship will be more exciting after this week… or forget about it.
Students: Jeeze!... who the hell is he? * some refuses to believe this will be their lecturer *

Scene 2: While my back facing the students and looking at my presentation slides.
Me: If you don't understand this, don't blame me, blame the industry who designs this. Understood? Any question? No? Then go home read it up. It’s easy to understand, right?
students: * whispering whispering * as though he is damn pandai...

Scene 3: While introducing myself to the class.
Me: My name is William and there will be assignments after every three weeks. All this will add up to your final semester 10%. Quiz 30%. 3 big exam papers equivalent 60%. I don't care if you got other assignments not related to my class or you are working part time at night. If you fail then you did not manage your time well for my class. So decide now.
Students: This lecturer real KNNMCB &^^*%$$^%$%@#$#$%...

Scene 4: One day before Chinese New Year Holiday/Hari Raya/Deepavali/Wesak Day/Christmas/Labour Day/Teacher's Day/Agung's Birthday/PM's Birthday/Sultan's Birthday/Father's birthday/Mothers' birthday/Grandfather's Birthday/etc
Me: Here is your research questions. I want that on my box when you come back. No extension. Delay will be shot!
Students among themselves: Awwwww... f**K!

Scene 5: One week before the exam
Me: Ok chapter 1 to chapter 8 will be coming out. But please study this book also... the industry has upgraded their spec. Chapter 1 to chapter 3. Don't blame me. Blame the industry.
students: Kanasai!

Scene 6: One student came to my room.
Student: Sir, I have a problem completing my project.
Me: Which project? Be specific.
Student: The assignment 3 blah blah blah.
Me: * busy with his blog *
Me: what did you say? say that again?
student: * in his heart - *&^*&^%&%##@$ * sorry sir, its blah blah blah...
Me: oh that one... simple only mar... what problem?
student: * in his heart - &%$*&##%&&$$^ * its blah blah blah...
Me: ok, take this book and read. Chapter 3 to chapter 4. The answers are all there. Go read and apply it. If cannot then... aiya you go do first... cannot then we only decide hor? Learn lar like your friend XXXX who has finish that already. See! His project here on my table already. Go now. Just to remind you, your due date is one day tomorrow. No extension understand?
student: * in his heart - kanineh kanasai MCBHKCDLLM * thank you sir. * silently tiu! *

Scene 7: Final days before the semester is over.
Me: Everything I taught in the class and the things you learnt and did through pain and blood... I hope you understand that it is for your own good and you should not blame me. Its the industry. The industry changes faster than you changed your girlfriends or boyfriends... Moreover, you are all still young and have a bright future. Please fill this survey form for me. Thank you.
Students: Tiu!

is sky the limit... teaching will be syok.

Someone else is sleeping in my room...

Last night, I heard someone snoring very loudly and walked into the bedroom. I saw another person sleeping next to Florence. I got so angry, like i wanted to meletup and go mad, and decided the most evil thing a man do could do...




I took his photo as evidence...




Awww... ain't he cute...



Florence : what he?! is a she... her name is Pinky... how many times must i tell you?!


* whack whack whack *


Me: Aduh... Aduh...



is sky the limit... shussshhh.... Pinky is sleeping...

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

Moody Indulging Food...

If you are ever feeling moody and just want to chew and swallow. Here is another recipe that you might want to consider at night after dinner and before supper. Beware high calorie and full of sweetness.

Ingredient:
2 packs of cheese nachos
2 packs of huge chocolate bars with hazel nuts
1 pack of raisin
3 scoops of ice cream (your favorite choice – Haagen Daz or Baskin Robbins)
I big glass bowl

Method:
First, put in the 2 packs of cheese nachos into the bowl. Second, crush the huge bar of chocolate with hazel nuts into the bowl. Third, sprinkle the raisins on top of it. Final, put in the 3 scoops of ice cream on top.

Additionally, you can finish the preparation with two waffles spread with peanut butter.

Now you can start indulging moody appetite.

Is sky the limit… indulges… indulges

Get Fat Recipe...

I know this entry could help TC so I decided to draw up one good recipe for him. For other readers please do not follow this recipe as it contains a lot of calories and it is very bad. This recipe does not teach you to have a balance eating or diet to have nice body figure. So you have been warned about this; so does this entry's title. On one hand, most likely COM will tick this recipe being fit for a king. Yes it is and it does.

Morning: (7:00 am)
1 glass of fresh milk directly from the cow.
1 pack of nasi lemak with one fried egg (hor pau tan) and fried chicken drumstick.
2 half boil eggs. You may sprinkle some pepper and some soy sauce.
1 curry puff while you pay your bill.

Snack: (10:30 am)
1 cup of instant Campbell corn and cheese soup with croyton.
1 packet of tasty cheese cracker or butter cracker.
Optional: You can have one packet of Mars bar chocolate.

Lunch: (1:00 pm)
1 glass of Teh Tarik.
1 plate of white rice (add rice) serve with one Begedel (mash fried potato), one fried chicken drumstick, some fish curry paste, one fried egg and some stir fried cabbage.
1 plate of kaya glutinous rice.
Additional: You can have a cone of mix ice cream from Macdonalds.

Tea Break: (3:00 pm)
1 slice of Hawaiian pizza.
1 slice of Oreo cheese cake.
2 slices of steam yam top with fried onions and chillies.
1 cup of milk tea with some butter corn flavour.
Optional: Instead of steam yam, you can choose fried Wadei so it is more feeling.


2 glasses of Coca Cola or Pepsi for the rest of the working hours.

Snack on highway when it is jam:
Pop in 1 pack of M&Ms to chew.

Dinner: (7:30 pm)
2 bowls of white rice.
1 plate of grilled cheese hot dogs (3 rolls). Top with mayonnaise and side with cheese nachos.
1 plate of stir fried brocolli with big Tiger prawns top with mayonaise and butter.
1 plate of steam huge black pomfret top with finely slices of ginger, chopped onions and garlics and dry mushrooms. Sprinkle with black pepper and marinated with some salt, light soy sauce, sesame seed oil, and oyster sauce.
1 small plate of Fuh Yee (Marinated Spicy Sour Tofu) from Lee Kum Kee.
1 bowl of hot chicken soup.

1 glass of icy blended carrot and tomato juice mix with yogurt while you sit down to watch the news or enjoy the rest of your evening reading newspaper..

Supper (12:00 am)
1 bowl of Cintan Mee ( preferably one pack and a half) with prawn flavored seasoning.
Top with two cheese hot dogs and one fried egg (hor pau tan).
One Dagwood sandwich of your choice.

1 glass of hot milk added with pure honey just before you hit the pillow.

Dagwood sandwich:
3 slices of Gardenia bread.
1 bottle of mayonnaise.
1 bottle of peanut butter.
1 bottle of strawberry jam.
1 plastic container of Marigold butter or margarine.
3 slices of delicious smoked ham.
3 slices of fresh cabbage.
A few slices of fresh and cold cucumber.

Is sky the limit… just open your mouth and swallow…

Custom Bak Kut Teh at home

Last week, I had a good bak kut teh and my low poh felt she should make one for ourselves at home just to see how it turn out. So we bought a lot of meat and mushroom. Not to mention the bak kut teh herbs too. Here you are after one hour cooking in the kitchen.

One homemade Bak Kut Teh

Ingredients:
1 can of Enoki mushrooms.
1 pack of dry mushrooms.
1 can of button mushrooms.
1 pack of fillet chicken (we decided to skip pork since we had it on Saturday).
1 pack of Bak Kut Teh herbs.
Soy sauce and a few drop of sesame seed oil.
A lot of black pepper and two tablespoon salt.

Apart from that, we serve the Bak Kut Teh with another plate of stir fry cabbage and a few fried cheese hotdogs. It was a very sumptuous dinner just for 2 persons. As a result, this is my tummy that late evening.

Is sky the limit… custom bak kut teh… yeah

Monday, April 17, 2006

Bak Kut Teh... Burrrrppppp... Very Satisfied!

Again, Saturday came, we went for PC Fair and did a major shopping. Yup, we bought a lot of things. Then we went for Bak Kut Tech... err... i mean Bak Kut Teh.


At the usual restaurant:


Si tau poh: Ok, oi sik mek yeh? (what do you want to eat?)


Me: Claypot, a lot, a lot of mushrooms, mor ku, tai ku, ah ku, enoki ku... semua taruh. 70% kus and 30% pork. Pork i want lean... not fatty. No innards. I bowl of yew char kuey, 1 plate of por li sang choy, and two glass of ice tea... Oh, plus 4 bowls of rice.


Si tau poh: ok, no problem.


Florence and me: * get chopsticks and some chopped garlic ready *


After 15 minutes, the things arrived,


Florence and me: * yum yum yum *
Florence and me: * slurp slurp slurp *


After 20 minutes,


Me: burrrp... ok satisfied...
Florence: burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrppppppppppppp...


Me: ooi...
Florence: hehehehe... satisfied!



is sky the limit... bak kut teh syok! burrrrrpppppppp....

Friday, April 14, 2006

ISTL : Lunchtime Analysis

Disclaimer: Names has been changed to protect their identity. This entry is very long and read at your own sweet time. Those who hate long entries please read the short abstract. I will not be held responsible to anything written in this entry. Those who shall not like and hate this entry should leave this blog. Thank you.

The Short Abstract:
A business tower with limited supply and limited choice of food offer will result health hazard to its workers working there. To read this in details please read further.

Introduction:
This is a food source report conducted to analyze the effect of limited supply of food source in A*C*RP Mall towards its visitors who are mainly workers who work in its business towers.


To analyse the situation, i have re-created the scenario into a story.


Scenario:
As usual today TC, Padme, Kerry, LF and me went to our usual place for our usual food and drinks. Except for COM he wanted vegetarian and joined his other friend at another stall. We had the usuals for the past one year and four months. Yet, the days we need to endure this sickening usuals are still counting.


Definitely, we are sick of the usuals. Unfortunately, we work in A*C*RP Tower where good food are scarce and you need to force yourself to swallow it. Here is my observation of our daily question and answer routine to look for food. Again, I stressed its a routine. That routine which you cannot miss. If you miss it meaning there is an issue. Here is the observation:


Observation:
TC : * Walks over to my cubicle *
Me : * I looked up *


TC : Jom, makan.
Me : Yeah... where?
TC : Dunno.


Me : lets ask Padme and COM
TC : Yeah...


TC : jom, makan.
Padme : Yeah... where?
Me : * silent and praying *
TC : Dunno.


Padme : lets ask Kerry.
TC : Yeah...


TC : jom, makan.
Kerry : yeah... * smile like a cute angel * ... where?
Me : * silent and praying *
Padme : hehehe...
TC : Dunno.


Kerry : lets ask LF.
TC : Yeah...
TC : jom, makan.
LF : Yeah... where?
Me : * silent and praying *
Padme : hehehe...
kerry : * smile like a cute angel * hehehe...
TC : Dunno.


COM : Lets go down first...
TC, Kerry, LF, Padme, Me : ok.


* While in the lift *


Me : So where...
TC : Dunno.
Padme : anything...
Kerry : anywhere will do...
LF : hahahaha...
COM : * on his phone talking business deal *


* about to reach ground floor *


COM : * closed his phone * So, where do we eat?
TC : Dunno.
Padme : anything...
LF : hahahaha...
Me : * look at him * i love you...


* Out in the A*C*RP lobby *


Me : Ok, where?
TC : Dunno.
Padme : * silent and praying that William won't ask her *
Kerry : Hehehehe... anything lar
LF : * look elsewhere *
COM : * phone ring * hello, ya ya.. the business deal is on.. RM4.5 million... cash... not cheque.. preferably in suitcase... yak yak yak...


* Reaching the A*C*RP main shopping level *


Me : OK, where?
TC : Dunno.
Padme : * looking at Poh Kong Jewellery and smiling gleefully *
Kerry : Hehehehe... anything lar
LF : * look elsewhere *
COM : * still on his business deal *


* Reaching the bottom *


Me : OK, there is mamak, Kapitan chicken, mamak, uncle chillies, Giant restaurant, subway, and rak tahi.. i mean rak thai...
TC : Dunno.
Padme : * yak yak with Kerry *
Kerry : * yak yak with Padme *
LF : * look elsewhere *
COM : eh william, need to meet a business partner... you guys go ahead...
Me : ok.


* Reaching the mamak *


Me : * sigh... I just sat down on the mamak's table *
TC, Kerry, Padme, LF: * all sat down *


* at the mamak *


Indian brother : Minum?
Me : 5 gelas air suam.


Indian brother : Ok, makan?
Me : 1 nasi goreng biasa


TC : 1 nasi goreng biasa
Kerry : 1 nasi goreng sayur
Padme : 1 Mee goreng
LF : * Goes to the food stand to pick 1 fried fish, 1 tofu and white rice *


* Please repeat the above process and conversation from the beginning for one week, then one month, then one year and so forth *


Analysis:
Referring to the process above and to write this technical analysis, the restriction of food choices in one domain of a limited space will stricken the choice of human words and decision making. Given the time of one year and four months, the process of brainstorming for food will become redundant and the usual aspect of food selection will become a norm that for the specimen above will only follow what other specimen do in that particular space of time.


A*C*RP Mall need to expand or the specimen attending to its offer will have a shrinkage in vocabulary usage and lower level of brainstorming function which will affect the health of the specimen:


1. Lower vocabulary usage.
Given the fact that the working environment is very quiet, lunch time should be happier to compensate back the loss of vocabulary during working. Unfortunately, the limited number of food offer in A*C*RP Mall has further reduce vocabulary usage among the workers. Over the period, this may cripple the ability of the specimen to talk normally. To some specimen, it may be the reverse. Therefore, this type of specimen will likely to go crazy and play with their vocabulary.


2. Unable to perform decision making.
With much of the specimen working environment revolves around the email, many instruction given were according to email based instruction (EBI). In order to make the specimen more interactive, lunch hour should be the perfect hour to create interaction among themselves. However, A*C*RP Mall provides a limited food offer that has resulted many specimen unable to make a quick decision on which food to take. The mind has been numb by the fact of too little variety in food offering. Over the long period, it will be hazardous to the mouth muscle.


3. Repetitive Stress Injury.
Although this term is usually associated with computer usage injury but due to the repetitive activity of questioning and action for one week might injury to the specimen who repeatedly perform same the action. Take for example specimen name TC, the specimen has repeatedly answer "dunno" in every question put forth by specimen William. Though by repetitive answer Dunno may not result a lot of vein damage but the heavier damage will be more on the specimen who ask that question. It is noted that a quantity of water from the mouth organ was loss. Apart from that, the energy being wasted to emit the vocal sound so that it is well receive by other specimen. Over the long period of usage will result both specimen to suffer voice reduction syndrome.


Solution:
There is only one solution to prevent the above health hazard is to expand the food choice. By doing so, A*C*RP Mall will brighten up a lot of workers in that building. Moreover, the stress and injuries will reduce and more workers will be willing to stay in that building. It may be one factor to prolong one worker's tenure in the building.


Conclusion:
After one year and four months working here, the food offer need to re-adjust so that the satisfaction among the workers can be maintain at the happy level and at the same time reducing stress injuries.



This report has excluded the food's price and is not taken into consideration during the observation process. If the syndrome or health hazard continues to get worse in the future it shall be taken into analysis.



Is sky the limit... Lunchtime Analysis.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Do men cross their legs when sitting?

Public holiday is always the best. Unfortunately, my apartment is now television-less so entertainment is a little bit restricted in the evening. That faithful evening, i got hold of the latest CLEO magazine. After flipping through a few pages at the end, one article got my attention. That article had this question put like this:


Is it ok to cross your legs while you are sitting?


The answer is very much depending on the gender. For the female, it is fine to cross their legs while sitting. However, for males like us, we won't feel very comfortable. The reason because we have balls and it will be squeeze if we cross our legs while sitting.


So, that question was further discuss and improve as below:


Florence : so you really can't cross legs while sitting?
Me : Hmmm... dun feel good squeezing it lar... nope.


Florence : So it means sissy only cross legs lar?
Me : Hmmm... yup that is right...


Florence : But why they can squeeze and you cannot... sissy also got balls mar...
Me : Well, you know, low poh, if i ever cross legs, you and i got a big problem.


Florence : huh?
Me : You see, sissy have small balls, and most probably can't satisfy their partner at night. Understood so far? That is why all their friends are known as sisters.


Florence : ok.
Me : Then for guys like us, we are all consider the real man, the men, and we have the balls that is with the right size and the right skill we can use it to satisfy our partners every night. So wouldn't you like it? Therefore, I don't cross legs while sitting. I am a man. Again, Wouldn't you like it? * wink * wink *


Florence : Hamsap! What do you mean satisfy partner every night and wouldn't i like it... hamsap! hamsap!... go away... eeeeeeee.... hamsap!!!!!!


* CLEO magazine rolled up to hit the hamsap man who don't cross his legs while sitting *


* whack! whack! whack! *


Therefore guys, please be kind and gentle to your inheritance management system down there. Don't cross your legs. Squeezing is hazardous...



is sky the limit... we are men with balls

Kelentong

Kelentong - verb (ke ~ len ~ tong)


The act of simply expressing something to answer one's either question or action to avoid any difficulty and troubles that will be put to the person. It may also be that someone is lazy to provide answers or actions.


Pronounce as klan~tong, kelentong, geh len tong.


This word can be used in many ways depending on the scenario or the events.

Scenario 1: Answer exam questions
Student 1: Oi Ah Beng, how is your exam? Tough ar?
Student 2: Aiya... Kelentong saja lar...
Meaning : Just simply answer only.


Scenario 2: Talking rubbish
Student 1: How did you perform in your oral English?
Student 2: Aiya... kelentong a few words lar...
Meaning : Just simply say a few words...


Scenario 3: Writing unneccessary points
Student 1: Wah, your essay damn long... aiseh!
Student 2: Aiya... just kelentong something inside lar...
Meaning : Just simply put some thing into it lar... not very important one lar...

Scenario 4: Your boss telling you things that you don't want to hear
Employee 1 : How's the meeting dude?
Employee 2 : Aiya... kelentong saja mar... no change punya...
Meaning: Talk only lar... got change meh...


Ok, i have kelentong here in this entry too much already...



is sky the limit... just many kelentong-ing

Monday, April 10, 2006

To care and caring for the sick...

One Saturday evening, i was reading my low poh's Nursing textbook. It read, "Nursing is a practice of caring and to care for sick and the needy so it could rapidly heal". Another term read, "to aid the sick to rapidly heal with their environment... "


Then,


Me : Low poh, your nursing textbook define nursing as "caring and to care for the sick bla bla bla... " How come i am coughing you are not taking care of me ar?
Low poh : You want one kick from me ar?


Me : hehehehehe.... here says ma...
Low poh : * stare at me * I am not in uniform now...


Me : well, you can go wear your uniform... hehehehe.. we can play doctor and nurses... hehehehehe... * wink wink *
Low poh : * Ka - Thump! Haiyaaaar! - flying kick *


Me : argh!!!! Please dun hit me... please dun hit me... abuse! abuse! Nurse abusing patient! report! report!
Low poh : oh... now you say that lar? Ok out of the room tonight... sleep outside...


Me : ok ok... hehehehehehe.... * pretending to sleep like a baby *


is sky the limit... nursing is to care and caring for the sick....

Everything KAPUT!

Last Friday night, my cough was getting better. Still its slightly but not so worse than Thursday.


Apart from that, that Friday I am absolutely speechless with the things that had happened to me.


First, my notebook's CD ROM kaput. I wanted to upgrade to Windows XP Professional. It went kaput with "Tuk Tuk" sound. I am using W2K Professional.


Second, since my CD ROM kaput so i tried my external DVD/CD Burner to run the XP installation. It went kaput too. It wouldn't read the CD. Maybe i should try some other CDs. If it work on others, still i am going to get a new one.


Third, after failing to install XP, i gave up and went to see television. Guess what! My television kaput too! WTF?! It just pssst and black out. I tried hitting it a few times, the screen just come and go. Well, that is it for that television. More on TV episode.


I am max out and no entertainment currently at home. Can't do any technical review for SAP now. Thank god, i can still play Pharaoh 2 and Starcraft EXP. Well, i just stick to those games for the time being.


Shit... everything kaput at the same time... geez!



is sky the limit... kaput! kaput! kaput!

Water Spirit... Bah!

I need to and got to review this because at the end of the day I found this movie is not as good as the title said. Its a crap!

Water spirit
Not for the faint hearted
and pregnant women.

Ok lets hold this movie and its tagline to its value first.


When florence and me saw this poster both of us were like awe because of its tagline. Even the poster we felt it is scary enough. So we proceed to buy the tickets to see it.


Throughout the movie, the ghost was good only lar but the plot sucks. Utterly sucks.


Here is the spoiler:


Story goes back to the past in the first showing a group of girl students studying in a catholic school. They were taught by this strict principal. No, the principal did not do SM or anything that is sexually gratifying acts. Oh boy, i would have love this movie if that happen. Sadly, it did not. She preached them about SIN.


One day, one of the girl got horny with the priest, Father Miguel, and they make out like rabbits. As COM always said. At the end of it, yes the girl got pregnant. Unfortunately, the girl was looking at her pregnancy kit in the bathroom at the wrong time when the principal walked in and found out. To punish her sin, the principal proceed to pour hot water on her privates. Yes, she did it. Poor girl, she yelled and cried.


Then, on one hand, a group of girls were in the kitchen heard the girl cried. So they want to check it out and found the principal was punishing their friend. So they drowned the principal and dumped her body into the holy pond and vowed never to mention this to anyone.


After 18 years, the catholic school closed, the principal were never found, the girls are now adults and the one got who pregnant gave birth lar. One night, the holy pond was disturb and the ghostly principal came alive to kill the girls for their sin.


So the first to go was the girl who got pregnant. She was knifed at the throat. Gory. I am fine with it.


Then the second, the fat lady had both of arms amputated by a falling lift. Syok. I am still fine with it.


The third, cruxifixed in her own bathroom. Ok lar only.


The fourth, beheaded by a broken window. Nothing much... i've seen this in Braveheart and Lord of the Rings many times similarly being hacked off by swords or other things.


The fifth, burnt to death. Ok lar.


The sixth, had died before the movie began. * scratch head.. .no idea *


The last, the daughter was spear through the chest. This is the shittest part... illogical... just do not understand it.


Well, the last killing event happen to be in a water-filled chamber where the heroine intend to eliminate the principal in the water. Of course the ghost and the heroine died-ed. Why? The daughter was possesed the ghost, i think. the objective the heroine died was not clearly made out. If the director complained me i would just say, "Tiu, your movie last half part... i am blurred to the max!"


One thing about this story, it is absolutely nothing horrifying and as faint hearted as it is describing in its tagline. I would not say pregnant women should not watch this. It is more of a laughing ghostly act.


Even though there are few scary moments but towards the trip from New York to Barcelona the events are more a like what the hell's going on. Some things are just plain illogical like the friend priest Gabriel trying to make out with the daughter in the dead principal's room. Would you want to do that? No way. The movie characters just keep on going up and down or miss this things or that things. Clearly, it has no suspense and thrill effect in it.


After watching this movie, i do not find the tagline that convincing. Not for the fainted heart?! Are you kidding?

If you were asking is the ghost scary? No, movies like Ring, One Miss Call, Reincarnation ghost characters are more scarier than this! By the way, Reincarnation is the next upcoming ghost movie from Japan. I will be definitely watching this with Florence.


The story is definitely lame.


If you have watched Water Spirit, please compensate your satisfaction by watching, When A Stranger Calls. Its awesome and full of suspense. I recommend that you watch this movie. Its packed with energy.


After leaving the show,


Florence : Water spirit.. eh...
Me : Water spirit... ptuiiieee....
Florence : hahahahahahahaha...


is sky the limit... not for the faint hearted?! My arse!

Thursday, April 06, 2006

The Oilment

This part is actually a comment to the part of "My sorethroat... relapsed... sigh...".

Do you know that it is scientifically proven in the world RE that if a survivor swallow his/her saliva, he/she can actually prevent sorethroat infection from happening. It's your saliva!

"Ever wonder when you work/study or concentrating do you ever swallow your saliva or you might be holding your saliva?"

'Constant swallowing your saliva can actually reduce 99% of throat infection' ~ source from the scientific world.










Well, if you don't believe it go check it out and rebut me!

My sorethroat... relapsed... sigh...

My sorethroat is back again... sigh...

doctor : more pills, more antibiotics, and more anti-inflammatory meds... go rest...

* swallow * swallow * ok guys see you sometime after i am thorough with this bad cough and throat...

* cough * cough *

* cough * cough *

* cough * cough *

* cough * cough *



* cough * queeekkk.. ptuiiii.... * cough *


is sky the limit... yes, its when you are sick!

Monday, April 03, 2006

Ptuii! or Gulp it... Disgusting...

Warning : Sick and gross entry on phelgm. Read at your own risk.

Sick and tired of the damn cough. Everywhere i go, that throat of mine is always looking for the opportunity to make me cough. All day and all night, i am coughing here and there. The phelgm in my throat is nasty.


One day, while i was driving:


Me : * cough * cough * ah haks .... grrl.... * phelgm was in my mouth *


Do i wind down my window and spit out? Maybe in the process my phelgm will hit someone's screen and that guy unable to see the front car and smash onto it. How about, if my phelgm suddenly fly across the street due to aerodynamics its physical feature, landed on a biker's helmet. Or even drop into his mouth! Eeewww... Disgusting...


Me : * shit *


I did the last thing and the most disgusting thing


Me : * gulp *


I have swallow it.


Florence : So how did it taste?


Me : huh?! what taste?
Florence : hehehe... that phelgm you have been trying to vomit out... hehehehe...


Me : * blush *
Me : hehehehe... don't want to discuss leh... disgusting lar...


Florence : A bit salty, sweet, bulky, and some creamy taste right? Admit it lar...
Me : Wah you... * speechless *


Me : you are right... wah lau...
Florence : hahahahahaahahaa....


Me : o_O""" hahahhahahaahaha.... you are disgusting!
Florence : What disgusting?! Normal mar... don't know where to ptuiii... swallow it lar... hahahahaha...


My dear friends, if you are as disgusting as me... please tell me about it.


Eewww... yuck!


is sky the limit... gulp... yikes!